Don’t waste time. It took 3 years after my divorce to be ok and enjoy doing things by myself. I have always been a planner in my life, even when I was married I would always be busy with either my kids or friends. After my divorce, I would never be alone. I would either have my kids or make plans with my friends. For the first couple years, I was ok with not being alone and I had enough friends to make plans with all the time.
It was such a hard thing for me to overcome because my life would go from having 3 crazy loud busy kids to nothing…deathly quiet. No yelling, no fighting, no constant questions, and no one that needed anything from me. I was alone and it sucked. Your married friends will think it sounds heavenly, but the feeling really sucks. The feeling is so hard to explain when your life goes from complete chaos to a complete halt in a matter of hours. You wonder now what do I do… do I walk around Target for hours to avoid being at home alone?
I finally realized I could not wait for my friends to do things.. If I wanted to do something I should just do it. Then last summer I decided to buy a paddle board… It is a scary feeling to have enough confidence to do something on your own. I had many thoughts going through my head… will people wonder why I am alone, will I not know what I am doing, will I fall off and drown. No one will even know where I am… since I am alone. All of those thoughts went through my head. The truth is that people could care less what I was doing and why I was there alone. However, if you are someone like me—always with people—it is a hard step to take. I pushed myself to do it and I loved it. That’s the truth.
Now, I will actually say no to plans with friends, so I can have some time for just doing things by myself. Either trying out a new place to hike or going paddle boarding. I will actual plan for that time in my week and make sure that I do it. Life gets crazy and if I actually schedule the time, then I will do it. A year or two ago I would not have been able to do that.
If there is a hobby or activity that you are really wanting to try, you just need to do it. Do not wait for others to join, but try it on your own. Honestly, now I love the times that I have to myself.
Thank you for reading,
Many of us have goals in our heads of things that we want to see happen. Yet they never quite make their way to paper nor do we achieve them. This weekend I am launching my new class, “The 7 Ways to Create Good Fortune” and one of the points that will be covered is setting goals and actually writing them down, working with them in an ACTIVE way, and how to reach the end result.
In preparing the materials for the class I did some research into the power of actually writing down objectives and backing them up with action plans. As a result I came across this study and it was really interesting to see the importance of writing down objectives and creating a plan.
In 1979, Harvard Business School did a study on the graduating class and their goals. Here is some of what they found.
- 84% of the class had set no goals at all
- 13% of the class had set written goals but had no concrete plans
- 3% of the class had both written goals and concrete action plans
10 years later, the 13% of the class that had set and written down their targets but had not created concrete plans, were making twice as much money in comparison to the 84% of the class that had set none at all.
The 3% of the class that had both written down goals and a plan, were making TEN TIMES as much money as the rest of the 97% of the class.
Pretty interesting, right? I will be talking to you more about your goals. How to set them and how to make them work for you. Start thinking about what you would like to achieve in 6 months, 1 year, 5 years. WRITE them down! This is your first step in the beginning of how to create your own personal good fortune.