Tag Archives: pictures

Photo Memories

Photo Memories

Over the past weeks that we have been staying at home, Im willing to wager that you have been taking more pictures than normal. And even if you havent, when you do, the dilemma always is how can I make my pictures look better?

All new phones come standard with high quality cameras and the ability to edit photos right on the phone. Since I use an Apple iPhone, I am familiar with its built in editing capabilities…. and they really are very good, But I often find that Id like to do additional things to my photos.

Snapseed (free) is a very robust Photo editing app and has become my go to editing app for my photos. In addition to all the standard editing functions It has features like the ability to easily erase features in the picture, like telephone wires or a stray objects that are distracting. It also has very advanced features that were only previously found in expensive apps. I highly recommend giving it a try.

Group shot (.99) is in app that literally performs magic. You know all the times you took a group photo that was perfect except for that one person with their eyes closed. With GroupShot the trick is to take multiple photos of the group. Then you can replace that one person with their eyes closed with them in another photo where they have their eyes open. Its as easy is swiping over their face in one photo and then swiping over their face in another photo and presto the first photo now has everyone with their eyes open.

If youre a fan of filters, Prisma (free w/ in app purchases) is an app that will transform your photo into what looks like a painting or water color. There are so many options that It is often difficult to choose which one to use, but the results are amazing.

After playing around with some of these apps, you will be amazed at what a good photographer you really are. You will have finished products you are really proud of.


No Filter

I turned 48 in November. As I do every year I made myself a promise.

This would be the year of no filter.

I started simply. I removed Snapchat and any photo editing apps from my electronics.

When I did take a picture I added a cheeky caption- “me in my bathroom while my child is getting ready for bed.”

Surprisingly my friends were into it.

I also did this in a response to strengthen my confidence. I still struggle. I am not going to tell you I don’t. I am not a size five. I just cut my hair off and I’m covered in tattoos. I am not the stereotype of what sometimes our world tells us is attractive.

And I know I’ve sang this song before, but sometimes there will be a wobble and I need a reminder.

I also have a daughter. What am I saying to her by editing my photos before posting them? It’s one thing to not post a photo because my eyes are closed or maybe my smile is a bit goofy. But to change it to the point I don’t look like me.

I can’t show her that.

Although, I do like the filter that puts tacos around my head.

There is a great quote “in a society that profits from self doubt, liking yourself is a rebellious act.”

Every week I write these blogs encouraging you all to love yourselves meanwhile I’m struggling.

That’s my secret to share in this year of no filter.

I am a fabulous cheerleader for others.

Me- I need to work on.

So with each picture I post in color, without a fun Snapchat filter, I’m learning to love the freckled, wrinkled face staring back at me.

Look Mommas if you dig the animal ears, you do you. Seriously. But you are gorgeous with or without those ears.

<3 Caprise

A Picture Is Worth A Thousand Words

A picture or pictures…

I am going to start by saying originally I was going to write something a little light this week. Maybe riff about some of the disastrous dates I’ve had. Talk about a funny discussion I recently had with some fellow Moms about what a growing a person does that no one tells you… and I will.

Except I need to get this out. Good, bad or otherwise thanks to modern technology we have found ourselves able to share and take pictures. Of everything. Ourselves included.

I would like to tell you I don’t know what a selfie is. Except if you read my BIO, it is glaringly obvious my picture is a selfie. My Instagram – selfies. My Facebook… yup.

I think you get it.

When I first joined social media my profile picture was so old my friends would tease me about it. Those same friends now refer to me as the Queen of Selfies.

I’m gonna own it, I can be excessive. It didn’t start out that way.


It started out with one or two pictures. Pictures I took for my boyfriend who at the time lived three hours away, who raved about how beautiful I was. That felt good. So I posted it. People liked it. That felt good. So recently after posting a picture of myself when a friend commented that I post a lot of selfies and more in a private message,I was crushed.

I recognize self love is important and I’m getting there. Promise.

But I’m about to be candid…

If you’ve read my blogs you know some of this. If you haven’t well..

Here’s my why. At least some of it.

When I was five everyday after school two older girls would follow me and call me witch face.

When I was 11 I was beat up by a boy because another girl was mad I was friends with a boy she liked.

At 17 I went to prom with a bunch of girls because I was so incredibly shy if a boy talked to me – red as a lobster.

I have eczema.

Struggled with my weight.

Had horrible teeth, coke bottle glasses. Don’t get me started on the infamous haircuts.

I also have scars from surgeries while not necessarily visible to all, I know…

At 47 I struggle with my self image as much as I want to love what I see looking back at me, I have my moments. My vision is skewed. Selfies are MY reminder look at where you’ve come from lady.

Just LOOK!

A bad marriage.

An abusive relationship.

Being unhealthy, unhappy, a bad haircut.

This is YOU!

Remember when you wanted a tattoo – guess what?


Wanted to go blonde?

Ta da!

Wear leggings as pants?

You go girl.

Your teeth!

You can actually smile!

With your teeth!

In a society that is so quick to say love yourself we sure have no problem passing judgment.

Even down to things like makeup. Do you know how many times a mutual friend will post “shout out to all the ladies who don’t need makeup to feel beautiful”.

I don’t either. I just REALLY like it.

Getting ready in the morning is my ritual. I paint, legitimately. Watercolors are my favorite. Makeup is just one more outlet for me. Just like my clothes and tattoos…

There is a meme that says: Shout out to all the ladies trying to love themselves in a world constantly telling them not to.

It’s true. What’s disappointing is it’s not just the world. It’s your friends, sometimes even your family. I’m a Sagittarius. We are a honest people who go with the flow. Constant optimists even when we’re hurting.

That said I hope that at some point the snark stops. I don’t have to buy books on how to help my tween maneuver middle school mean girls.

That when you say love the skin you’re in. You mean it.

Until then. Momma take that selfie. Wear those leggings. Put on that lipgloss or don’t. Eat those Nutter Butters for breakfast.

Either way, I really do celebrate you.

Love yourself. You worked your ass off to get here.

Give yourself a break.

Much love Mommas,

Single Mom of the amazing Dbl G
Sometime DJ
T-shirt collector
Henry Rollins Middle Aged Punk Prom Date

Four Steps To Tinder-Time aka How To Build The Perfect Profile

After WAY too much experience on Tinder, I have gleaned the essence of the perfect profile – something that will increase your odds of attracting a man who is halfway decent and better than a serial killer.

If you are looking for a hook-up, a shag, a slam-bam-thank-you-man and nothing more, put up your sexy pics, don’t bother with a blurb, and watch Looking for Mr. Goodbar – because you’d be  safer meeting a dude at a dive bar in Barstow (look it up), where you can at least check out his friends and assess how he smells in person.

The world can be a dangerous place, especially for us gals.

If you are like the rest of us over-forty female fun-seekers, you probably have hopes of meeting a decent guy, dating a bit, falling a bit, fu$%-like-bunnies, then enjoying a blissful life of romance and love. This is why building your profile carries a weight equal to writing a Presidential inaugural address. This could be the rest of your life… and the world is counting on you to keep us out of war, stop global warming, and save the planet.

Be savvy when creating your profile.  Don’t rush.  Think about it.  And create it with Tinder Loving Care.


Tinder feeds off your Facebook account for your age, education, and photos, so if this concerns you, create a private album only you can see. This way, you post photos you might not normally post on your Facebook (aka shots of your cleave).

1st photo – Primary photo:

You have five seconds to grab his attention. Ergo, your primary photo is where you put your best foot forward.  This is the picture that flies across the Tinder screen as men frantically search for the perfect woman (aka Jessica Alba).

Your primary photo should be some sort of headshot – showing your bright eyes, your sparkling smile, and the color of your hair.  Your face should reasonably fill the screen so that a man will stop, attention captured, and explore the rest of your profile to learn more about wonderful YOU.


* You making duck face. (Only chicks dig chicks making duck face.)

* You making cross-eyed, dumb “I’m-so-fun” face. (If a dude wants Goofy, he’ll go to Disneyland.)

* You with your tits pushed up and out. (You reap what you sew.)

* You and five of your bff’s.  (Where’s Waldo?  Swipe left!)

* You way, way, way far away on a beach or a ski slope. (He’s not looking for an ant.)

* You kissing your pet (especially if it’s a cat).


2nd photo – Full body shot:

I do not mean a naked body shot – rather, a photo that shows you head to toe.  We want him to see that you do, in fact, have legs. (And if you don’t, own it!  There’s someone for everyone.)  The same goes for weight.  If there’s more of you to love – so be it.  A lot of dudes dig the zaftig gal.  And the ones who don’t, you don’t want to meet –  because they will be pissed that you aren’t the size of a thirteen-year-old girl.  (Even if he’s a bald dude who wore a hat in all of his own photos).  With profile pics, honesty is the best policy.

NOTE: I know it’s what’s in your heart and mind that matters.  Today’s culture, where photo-driven technology has made looks more valued than intellect, modern romance has been reduced to the superficial (at least at first).  Connection starts with the physical and one can only hope to find a man with the depth to hang around long enough for the physical to grow into something more.  Moms, raise your sons well, because your daughters are the yous of the future (aka dating existentialism).


* You in a bikini, twenty years ago.

* You twenty pounds lighter, twenty years ago.

* You… twenty years ago.

* A full body shot of anyone who is NOT you right now.


3rd photo – Sporty shot:

Remember, these are men we’re dealing with.  They want to know you live an “active lifestyle,” you care about your personal appearance, and that you will somehow manage to never, ever age.



* You athletically eating a cheeseburger. (Doesn’t count!)

* You bench pressing 200 pounds. (He needs to think he can take you in a fight.)

* You zip-lining. (Nobody looks good zip-lining.)

* You in a football uniform, padded up. (You’re on the wrong site, sister.)

* You in world’s tiniest bikini, hand-standing on the beach, with your tits hanging

out. (You reap what you sew.)


4th photo – You have TWO choices:

  1. Intellectual shot:

You looking “intellectual”: reading a book, wearing glasses, playing the piano, contemplating the universe. If you are a teacher, a shot in front of your class; if you are an attorney, you in the law library; if you are a stripper, you in the law library.


  1. Homemaker shot:

You baking, planting, wearing an apron, painting a house, anything that says “Martha Stewart,” because every dude wants to bone Martha Stewart.

If possible, include A and B, as men ultimately don’t know what they want.


5th shot – Sexy shot:

I did not say “sex” shot.  Remember the song, “Man! I Feel Like A Woman?” (If you don’t, you are too young to read this and should pick up a copy of Teen Vogue).  You want to capture the essence of sex.  Let him know that underneath all your fabulousness, there is a real woman.  Tits and ass don’t equal sexy.  Tousled hair and a smile, LBD and heels, even barefoot in a man’s shirt – a woman owning her femininity is what grabs the good ones.  When you feel sexy, you look sexy, and men like sexy.

6th shot – Optional – for the moms:

If you are a single mom, you must mention this fact in your blurb.

You also have the option of putting a photo of your kids with you in your pics (do not put a photo of just your kids.  It is super creepy and just wrong). This is a personal choice.  If you are divorced, assume your ex will come across this photo – because I promise, he is Tindering as well.  Ask yourself if this will cause unneeded stress in your already strained relationship (even though he has a photo with your kids in his profile pics). If you decide to include a family photo, use it as your final shot.

You don’t want to give the impression you are pimping out your kids in order to get a date.  Personally, I did include a family shot for several reasons:  I think I am a good mom and am proud of this; my kids turned out great and I am proud of them; and the photo shows we love each other.  Most importantly, the shot was taken in Southern France, so if a dude recognizes we are on the beach in Nice he gets bonus points!


– Don’t use photos without you in them. (We’ve all seen sunsets and puppies.)

– More than six shots make you a narcissist.

– If the photo is blurry, you are hiding something.

– If the photo is over or under exposed, you are hiding something.

– Dudes don’t care about your baby picture (or any picture that isn’t you NOW).




You have 200 characters to make a blazing first impression.  Something is better than nothing, but less is more.  Do not use deep quotes or song lyrics.  Do not be too specific.  Lead with what efficiently sums up the type of person you are and list an interest that gives a dude something to connect with. Then briefly state what you are looking for in a man.



Do not leave your blurb blank.  In Tinder speak, blank blurbs mean you just want to get laid.

Do not say you are looking to “Netflix and chill.”  This is Tinder code for you just want to get laid. (Unless this is what you want, and if so, see WARNING: Stupid Girls.)

Consider the following two blurbs:

  1. “Fun-loving astrophysicist enjoys scuba diving, salsa dancing, and Fargo. Seeks honest, intelligent man for coffee, conversation, connection – and perhaps more, should the stars align (pun intended). No hook-ups please.”
  2. “I.T. professional, Stanford grad, sports fanatic; enjoys yoga, the outdoors and a good Hemmingway novel; vegetarian, but not overtly so; non-drinker, but able to limbo. Seeks fun and relaxed partner. Hoping for LTR but happy to date.  No hook-ups.

(NOTE: LTR is a Tinder acronym, aka “Tindernym,” for lifetime romance and/or long term relationship.)


These blurbs have it all: personality, profession, sport, hobbies, a dash of wit, and relationship goals.  These profiles will get hundreds of hits.

Now consider this blurb:

“Overwrought, unemployed single mom with deadbeat ex seeks guy to take her to dinner, so she can get blindingly drunk, forget her problems, and make out in the car.  No hook-ups.  Gluten free.”

Unfortunately, this profile will also get hundreds of hits.

Finally, there is this blurb:

“Happily married, gorgeous movie star with rockin’ bod, billion dollar company, perfect children, and the initials Jessica Alba seeks YOU! Middle aged man with a paunch and mid-life-crisis who refuses to grow up and give any decent woman a chance because he thinks he can get me.”

Still, the same amount of hits.  Let’s face it, dudes don’t read the blurbs. Or worse… they do and don’t care.



* Go to the App Store on you cell phone.

* Tap on the free Tinder application.

* Done!


* On your phone, open your Tinder app.

* Go to “settings” (the nuts and bolts icon).

* Once inside, tap on your photo over “view profile.”

(This will show you what your Tinder profile looks like.)

* Tap “Edit Info.”

* Pull photos from Facebook and arrange them as desired.  Insert your “blurb.”

* Once completed, tap out to the main menu and go to, “Discovery Settings.”

* Select the parameters of your potential mate.

* Tap out and tap on the flame.



If you would like to read more of P.Charlotte’s musings, you can find her here:


Also be sure to follow her on Instagram and Facebook at pcharlottelinsday.