Tag Archives: peace

Every Action Has An Equal And Opposite Reaction

Every action has an equal and opposite reaction. I say this because recently some people whom haven’t out grown their high school behaviors had came into my life.With these people in my life I noticed myself second guessing my decisions and goal, my stress level was at an all time high and I have been completely distracted. I let these people affect my peace, an old habit that I’m still not 100% better at. The difference from this time and others is that I haven’t been excusing or dismissing red flags, being constantly on high alert is why my stress level has been so high.

One of these individuals has been involved or on the receiving end of some gossip about me. Instead of talking to me this person decided that what ever they have been told is true and decided to end our friendship. Which is fine, I let them know that the drama level had been getting to me and that I was already taking a step back, I wished them the best and went on my way.

The level of growth I see in my self for responding this way is astronomical. Just a few years ago, I would have been bending over backwards to save this friendship, trying to prove that I didn’t do whatever it is that was said I did. Now, I don’t see the point, If anyone wants to walk out of my I will let them. My peace progress and happiness are more sacred than any single person in my life.

I’ve noticed that these people are not happy with my non reactive approach and are trying to get a response from me. Which is fine, I know if I let it be they will eventually get bored and leave me alone. I refuse to allow anyone to pull my focus in other directions. I am very blessed for the amount of growth I have experienced these last few years and I am excited to keep growing.

 

Always be unapologetically true too yourself,

-Ali

Letting Negativity Steal Your Joy

Negativity- what a nasty little critter. It can steal the joy of any situation and have you at odds with yourself and the people around you. The more excuses you make for negativity in your life the more it will multiply.  I am currently in a situation where I am surrounded by negativity quite often and I used to react to it with more negativity.  It just ended up compounding on itself and became unbearable.  Until one day I stopped reacting to the source of the negativity, I started to feel bad for that person. also instead of judging that person, I decided to declutter myself.  I did that by starting a daily gratitude list. Also Instead of engaging in negative things I just walk away. If someone is throwing a pity party I don’t enable and I don’t argue I walk away. If the news gets too negative If i can I shut it off I will, if not I leave the room and go listen to some peaceful music.  Not engaging in a battle of wills doesn’t mean you surrender to the negativity, It means you value yourself and your peace more.

Our life/reality is shaped entirely by how we look at and accept things. NO one else can feel the exact same feeling as us, our feelings are ours, same with our thoughts. We cannot change other people, and we can only change circumstances and environments so much. The one true thing we have control over in this life and can change is ourselves. When  you see something in someone else that bothers you, please take a moment. Stop analyzing that person and their behaviors, and instead reflect on yourself, why does that bother you? Why are you allowing that person to interrupt you peace? You may be surprised that negativity may be feeding off of your of insecurity or personality defect. The quickest and most surefire way to eliminate that situation is to work on yourself. Remember Negativity is the thief of joy, and it can only rent a space in your life if you allow it. Today I choose to be grateful. What are you grateful for today?

 

-Always be unapologetically yourself,

Ali

What’s The Condition of Your Space?

Did you know there’s a connection between the condition of your living space & surrounding environment AND your mood, productivity, creativity and stress level? A cluttered environment saps your energy and robs you of a creative flow, positive outcomes & precious time. Living in, or working with, physical or mental chaos… can change your mood like *SNAP* that!  And sometimes it’s a lot harder to deal with THAT than the actual task of organizing it all.  The connection happens unconsciously.  You don’t wake up and say, ‘my day is going to be havoc today’…it just happens.  As you go about your morning you find yourself asking…. ‘Where are my keys?’ ‘What did I do with that letter?’ ‘Where is Johnny’s other sneaker?’ And then before you know it, you’re behind schedule, talking to yourself and walking around in circles.

When you’re always looking for things that should be at your fingertips, you spend too much important & precious time looking.  Clarity replaces Clutter!!  We live in a society which places many demands on our time. And one thing is for sure….we don’t have time to waste searching for that one thing we need before we can walk out the door, that one folder we need for the meeting or the school papers Suzi needs in her backpack before the bus gets here. If you create a place for everything and put everything in it’s place …that’s better than half the battle…..it demolishes the battle.  You find things in a *SNAP*.

Whether it’s your office, kitchen, garage, playroom, kitchen cabinets, dresser drawers… whatever it is…. …. it’s time to get back on track with a more efficient, harmonious space AND the next thing you know… you have a more efficient, harmonious life!

Be aware of your condition and declutter what you can so today is a breeze.

Peace & Blessings,

Tracy

Getting Comfortable with Being Uncomfortable…

One of the hardest lessons to learn is to get comfortable with being uncomfortable.  There are times in our lives when things are simply out of our control, times of transition are like this as well as when someone close to us is suffering from some circumstance that we cannot fix for them.   It can be heinous to just have to SIT in all of these things and it is SO UNCOMFORTABLE!!!

So, then we start to get angry or sad or we want TO DO SOMETHING to make it different…yet it just keeps being how it is and we feel like someone put our skin on backwards…it’s maddening really how awful it is to SIT IN SOMETHING that we cannot control.  Not only are we unable to control what is happening, we also do not know what the outcome will be.  This is when you must rely on your Faith to understand that even when you cannot see, you CAN trust that all things are working together for good.

What we resists, persists…so the longer we sit there wishing it were different, the longer it will stay just as it is.  This is where getting comfortable with being uncomfortable can serve you well.  What IS, IS.  As hard as it is to get comfortable with how uncomfortable we are during these times, we must.  Our very sanity depends on it.  There is much peace and wisdom in accepting things as they are, this does NOT mean that you stop working on solutions…it simply means that you STOP using your energy to fight being where YOU ALREADY ARE!!!

WHAT IS, IS.  You are here in this place, be ok with that…learn to get yourself comfortable with the unknown.  I have been sitting right SMACK in the middle of this place since I stepped down from my corporate position on April 26, 2017.  I have been uncomfortable in ways that you cannot even imagine and I have developed a new skill set for being able to be comfortable with transition and the unknown.  This is no easy skill to master, it has taken me the better part of 6 months to be at peace with what is and to trust that all is working together for good.  I had some pretty horrible days fighting how uncomfortable I was and it didn’t help anything, in fact it likely took solutions longer to find me because I was so unsettled in my mind.

Being comfortable or being at peace with being uncomfortable is not for the faint of heart, it is a skill only available to those of us that are willing to put our trust in God and understand that everything IS working for our good even when it looks like shit, even when we cannot see, even when someone that we love is suffering, EVEN THEN everything is working for the good.  When you learn to be at peace and stop fighting how awful it all seems, you will see the good faster.  Simply do the next task in front of you and then the next one, do what you can with what you have available to you and learn to be OK with what IS.

Sometimes the lesson is simply to lean into what is disturbing you the most and be at peace with it, only then can things shift into another place…remember what you resists, persists.

 

Leave Crazy to the Crazies

It’s funny really when you find yourself reacting to someone else’s childish and foolish behavior…you know what they are trying to do…get your attention…they can’t get your attention like an adult, by actually conversing…so they start acting out…because of course, any attention for these types of dysfunctional people is a win.
So they act out and you find yourself, much to your horror, reacting to them. Instead of doing what needs to be done and ignoring them. People like this DO NOT deserve our attention, their communication skills are sub-par and instead of having effective communication that works they fall into passive-aggressive, narcissistic behavior patterns. People like this are flawed at such a deep level that they don’t even see that they are like  hamsters running on a wheel to nowhere….FAST.
Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result. So us thinking that these people will behave differently is just as pitiful as what they are doing in the first place. When people SHOW you who they are, BELIEVE them.
Leave the crazy to the crazy people, grab your toys and exit the building…do not react to people like this—respond to them by ignoring their attempts to engage you and move on. People like this will only steal your energy and keep you from doing what you need to do…if someone wants to be in your life, let them ask. If you need to chase they don’t deserve to be on your radar.
You are worth so much more than that. The people that belong with you will make themselves known and it won’t be a circus, it will be peaceful. So stop reacting and everything else will take care of itself.

Some Life Advice …on Easter Sunday

Easter Sunday, a time for new beginnings and new seasons. Time to shed the things that aren’t working and start living the life that you want to live, doing that often means taking stock of how things have been and making adjustments as needed. Spring and Easter are excellent times to do this, so late last night I penned some life advice for myself and it seemed prudent to share it with you. Enjoy.
Life Advice after 46 years…

• Make sure that you feel ‘at home’ in your own home. This is your place of grounding and peace, if you can’t restore yourself there then everything else will be out of balance
• Keep things in order, houses, desks, closets, cars, papers, etc. Disorder brings disjointed states of mind…it is difficult to operate in excellence with disorder surrounding you
• Get rid of stuff that doesn’t serve you—relationships, items, whatever isn’t serving you is stealing your energy and holding you back (whether you want to admit it or not)
• Try new things…always
• Don’t worry so much about whether or not you are doing things ‘right’—life is a process…make adjustments as you go
• Be smart, read, learn…never stop learning
• Be funny and don’t be mean
• Don’t complain, criticize or make fun of…you get what you give
• Put away money for a rainy day
• Have FUN with your life, we only do this here once, make the most of it
• Cultivate your “REAL” friends, let the superficial bullshit go—it just wastes time
• Enjoy your own company
• LIVE—stop waiting for your ‘real’ life to begin, these moments right NOW—these ARE your life—so LIVE them OUT LOUD
• Feel your feelings and express them responsibly
• Respond, don’t react
• Remember your words have power, use them to help not hurt
• Tell the TRUTH—always—NO EXCEPTIONS
• See yourself as others see you and be mindful of how you treat people and remember karma never loses an address
• Be READY for whatever comes, always have a plan B, maybe C and D too
• Expect the BEST, you deserve that
• Remember that nothing is too good to be true, if you do the work you deserve the reward because you EARNED it
• Don’t enable people, let them learn like you have
• Keep your peace—no HIGH highs, no LOW lows—leaders are STABLE people, they keep their JOY in all things and they keep going
• Keep moving forward, don’t look back—you are not going that way
• Be aware of your blind spots, we all have them. Work on them and don’t let them trip you up—pay attention
• Don’t ignore the obvious just because you don’t like it, if it is being revealed to you then there is a reason—something there for you to see
• If you have children PARENT THEM, discipline them, teach them to produce results, teach them that actions have consequences. Kids don’t need you to be their friends—they need you to be their PARENTS—you are putting people out into the world, so make sure that they are ready.
• Be of service, help others.
• Leave things better than you found them
• If someone shows you a behavior, BELIEVE IT! Actions will tell you everything you need to know about someone. Words are just lip service.
• Don’t overthink. When in doubt, go with your gut. Period.
• If it doesn’t feel right to you, it ISN’T—-so don’t do it. Period.
• TRUST yourself.
• LOVE yourself
• Make peace with your past
• Forgive, not for them, for YOU
• Welcome your future
• Do your best
• And above all—TRUST GOD—ALWAYS—NO EXCEPTIONS!