My new normal and ready to pivot…
It’s Sunday and as I do every Sunday I am listening to music and writing.
This Sunday I have an officemate. He’s eighty pounds and since it’s storming he would really like to be a lap dog.
My guy AKA the majestic goldendoodle I call Doozer.
We are listening to YUNGBLUD Strawberry Lipstick today. The chorus “take it easy on me…”
I feel that in my bones right now. After working from home since the end of March I go back to working in an office in a week, with people. A few things, in all of this I continue to be incredibly grateful to be working. I love what I do. I love who I work for and who I work with.
So this is not that.
There are little things I am worried about.
There are also big things.
I have a routine with my daughter and the guy hanging out with me right now.
I don’t know the last time. I wore shoes.
I haven’t driven much. Pants? What are those?
Up until March for thirteen years I worked a job where I was on call from six AM to six PM. Then a new job and two weeks later COVID.
I was forced to slow down. Rethink everything and I have said this before as horrible as this all is… I gesture broadly. The time with my daughter. Phone conversations with my friends every week. I read books. I stop. I am thankful, I am grateful. I breathe.
As some people close to me say, we’ve had to learn to pivot.
Now it’s five months later and another pivot.
A change to my new normal.
And I’m scared.
Am I still going to do the things I’ve learned?
I keep going in my daughter’s room just because. She’s thirteen and is not amused. I say I am doing this because in a week I can’t anymore.
I wear shorts and t-shirts everyday.
I don’t do my hair.
Again I am thankful I have friends who have been dealt a much different hand. G’s Dad actually let me know he lost his job.
So I am incredibly aware of how close to the ledge I walk. And how incredibly lucky I am.
But maybe the worry, the fear, the nervousness is good. It means I’m aware of my new normal. I’m aware I am going to have to be ready to pivot.
And honestly at our core isn’t that what we do as Moms?
Much love Mommas