Tag Archives: insight

Measuring Stick Opinions

Measuring stick opinions…

Will what you’re about to say add value to my life?  

Is it hearsay or truth?  

Who asked you anyway?  

Did I ask your opinion?

Can you hear yourself saying that?  I can.  These are some of the things that I’d like to say to some people who THINK I care about what they have to say, especially when I never asked what they thought.  When I don’t care, I shrug, I nod, I smile and then I walk away.  

Do we really care what someone, especially outside of our inner circle, thinks of us?  Does it matter in your heart that THEIR opinion of you, matters?   

Are they your measuring stick?  Nobody else holds the measuring stick for you….UNLESS you give it to them.  Now why would you go and do that?!   YOU have got to know how wonderful you are.  YOU have got to see how beautiful you are.  YOU have got to believe how valuable you are.  

That’s what matters.  Not their opinion. 

UNLESS maybe …if it’s your mom, or your best friend or your big brother.  Then maybe it truly does matter.  In that case we should be willing to sit down and listen to them.  As they speak from their heart – because they love you so dang much – AND if they can tell you the truth with kind, loving words…. Then maybe you should listen.  ESPECIALLY when you asked them what they thought!   Right?

Remember…don’t ask for someone’s opinion and then get mad at them for giving it.  

And if it’s someone outside your inner circle, who seems to think that what they have to say about you matters. Nope.  Uhuh.  There is no room for their measuring stick opinions.  Seriously.

Be the You that measures Yourself.


Your God girl,


Numbers Don’t Lie

The numbers don’t lie…

If you have been following along on the FB live Sunday Morning Coffee Chats and on the blog you know that I have been playing an effectiveness scoring game with myself since Jan. 12th.  This is a game/ measuring tool that I have invited you all to join me in—with every week that goes by I gain new insight into what stops me and how I am really showing up in my life.  It is proving to be quite telling.

After last Sunday’s Coffee Chat I decided to get a weekly average and graph it—so I added my daily score from each week and divided it by 7 to gain the weekly average.  The graph looks like this:

Clearly you can see that I am averaging 50% which is pretty pathetic….LOL.  Examining this data tells me everything that I need to know about why my life is where it is, don’t get me wrong I have a very blessed and fantastic life which I have worked really, really hard to create—yet with all I know and all that I have done this is the truth about me—I am showing up at about 50 something percent in my life.

The really interesting thing is that I now have to look at what I could create as my reality if my average was 80% or even 90%— who would I be able to be then?!—I have been asking myself this question since last Sunday…

So I do these averages and I make this chart and I look at it over and over and on Sunday I was a 30% and on Monday a 20% and then yesterday I decided that I would like to SEE what happens if I show up between 80 and 100 % consistently so I forced myself to be 100% yesterday and this morning I woke up with more energy to get things done.

Often I tell you that the worst battle you will every have is with yourself—my experiment with this listing game is really shining a light on that for me.  I told you that this was an assignment given to me decades ago from a coach of mine and that I have played it again over the years—however only for a week or two at a time.  This is the longest that I have ever evaluated myself and I have committed to you guys to do this until June.  It is going to be very interesting to see what reveals itself as I continue this.

Would love to have you play too and share with me what you are seeing about yourself.  You can go back and watch any of the Coffee Chats since Jan. 12th or go listen to the podcasts or read past blogs for instructions on how to make your list.  See you Sunday morning at 10am est for Coffee Chat.


XO, N.

Stop Labeling Ourselves

Labeling ourselves and others is becoming quite the norm nowadays.  Depressed, anxious, broken; we label ourselves with what we do and how well we do it, and how others see us.

Labeling- I’m finding as a peel away each one of mine layer by layer is just a way that I hold myself back, and in away remove the responsibility of being, and giving 100%.

When I don’t go out with friends or be social, “well I am a mom”. When I used to lie in bed all day “well i’m just depressed.” When Another relationship would fail “well i’m just broken.”

I used my labels as a shield. A good chunk I received from others, but I made them my own, and let them rule me.

For a long time I defined myself based on what other people see me as I wanted so desperately to change how other people see me. I failed to realize I cannot change others perspectives only my own.

When I first started peeling the labels away, I felt lost, almost naked in a sense. Who am I? Over the last year I have been discovering who I am under everything I let run my life. It’s been a long road and I am still not done. I have some big things in the works, things I wouldn’t have dared to dream of actually doing. 

It’s very freeing and maturing to let go of labeling, and not to try to change perspectives. As well as knowing that my perspective isn’t the only one. Its very reassuring aslo, to me I may be facing a dead end brick wall, but maybe someone else can see the door.

Keep Believing in Yourself,