Winning the way to my heart is not simple and some days I feel guilty for how difficult I can be. But yet, it’s my choice and I don’t feel anything that is winning my heart is asking too much, it is my heart, afterall.
Trust-I have trust issues. They go back to my youth, and my first marriage. I HAVE, have to trust you. Whether it be in a romantic relationship, or any relationship. As the saying goes..words are nice but actions prove so much more. Unfortunately, I don’t start out trusting someone. I start out not trusting and have to be proven to that I can trust you. I question every thing, repeatedly, until I feel confident. Most would say I go overboard with my trust issues. It’s who I am.
My Children-I need someone who is going to be a role model to my children. I am ok with them being their friend but they still need to be the adult in all situations. They must treat them as their own and love them unconditionally. Let’s be honest..children can be a pain in the ass and test every bit of patience you have. If you can win the love and respect of my children-YOU ARE IN!
Honesty-I cannot handle being lied to about ANYTHING! Honesty and trust pretty much go hand in hand. I think this one doesn’t warrant any explaining.
Respect-Respect is so very important. Giving respect as well as receiving it. Honestly it may be the most important one. I would never venture into a friendship without respect let alone a romantic relationship.
Love-Honest, pure, truthful, respectful, raw love. No strings attached. Love me for who I am and also for who I am not. And I will love you for you.
Love to All-
Easter Sunday, a time for new beginnings and new seasons. Time to shed the things that aren’t working and start living the life that you want to live, doing that often means taking stock of how things have been and making adjustments as needed. Spring and Easter are excellent times to do this, so late last night I penned some life advice for myself and it seemed prudent to share it with you. Enjoy.
Life Advice after 46 years…
• Make sure that you feel ‘at home’ in your own home. This is your place of grounding and peace, if you can’t restore yourself there then everything else will be out of balance
• Keep things in order, houses, desks, closets, cars, papers, etc. Disorder brings disjointed states of mind…it is difficult to operate in excellence with disorder surrounding you
• Get rid of stuff that doesn’t serve you—relationships, items, whatever isn’t serving you is stealing your energy and holding you back (whether you want to admit it or not)
• Try new things…always
• Don’t worry so much about whether or not you are doing things ‘right’—life is a process…make adjustments as you go
• Be smart, read, learn…never stop learning
• Be funny and don’t be mean
• Don’t complain, criticize or make fun of…you get what you give
• Put away money for a rainy day
• Have FUN with your life, we only do this here once, make the most of it
• Cultivate your “REAL” friends, let the superficial bullshit go—it just wastes time
• Enjoy your own company
• LIVE—stop waiting for your ‘real’ life to begin, these moments right NOW—these ARE your life—so LIVE them OUT LOUD
• Feel your feelings and express them responsibly
• Respond, don’t react
• Remember your words have power, use them to help not hurt
• Tell the TRUTH—always—NO EXCEPTIONS
• See yourself as others see you and be mindful of how you treat people and remember karma never loses an address
• Be READY for whatever comes, always have a plan B, maybe C and D too
• Expect the BEST, you deserve that
• Remember that nothing is too good to be true, if you do the work you deserve the reward because you EARNED it
• Don’t enable people, let them learn like you have
• Keep your peace—no HIGH highs, no LOW lows—leaders are STABLE people, they keep their JOY in all things and they keep going
• Keep moving forward, don’t look back—you are not going that way
• Be aware of your blind spots, we all have them. Work on them and don’t let them trip you up—pay attention
• Don’t ignore the obvious just because you don’t like it, if it is being revealed to you then there is a reason—something there for you to see
• If you have children PARENT THEM, discipline them, teach them to produce results, teach them that actions have consequences. Kids don’t need you to be their friends—they need you to be their PARENTS—you are putting people out into the world, so make sure that they are ready.
• Be of service, help others.
• Leave things better than you found them
• If someone shows you a behavior, BELIEVE IT! Actions will tell you everything you need to know about someone. Words are just lip service.
• Don’t overthink. When in doubt, go with your gut. Period.
• If it doesn’t feel right to you, it ISN’T—-so don’t do it. Period.
• TRUST yourself.
• LOVE yourself
• Make peace with your past
• Forgive, not for them, for YOU
• Welcome your future
• Do your best
• And above all—TRUST GOD—ALWAYS—NO EXCEPTIONS!