Be a good listener…I was in my office the other day and overheard an interesting conversation…
Mary was telling Kim (not their real names) about what her boy friend said to her that hurt her feelings. Kim said that she knew just how she felt because her boy friend had done something similar to her just last week. Kim then went on for a good 15 minutes describing in detail her incident. I’m sure her intent was to help Mary feel she wasn’t alone. Yet I’m not sure that’s what Mary felt.
I confess that I do the same thing sometimes. I have to catch myself and remember that who I am talking to didn’t ask for my advice or my commiseration. They simply wanted someone to listen to them. They don’t want me to fix anything, they want me to hear them. Hear how they are feeling and what they think.
We all yearn to be ‘gotten’, to be heard and understood.
More upsets are solved by listening than by offering advice. Dale Carnegie’s principle; Be A Good Listener, Encourage Other To Talk About Themselves is another pathway to more fruitful relationships.
Let’s all focus on being a better listener. We have two ears and one mouth for good reason… We should listen twice was much as we talk.
You probably know about Apple’s AirPods by now. I have been using them for over 2 years and still believe that they are one of Apple’s great achievements.
I have always tried to wear a headset when using my phone and continually am challenged by the wire connecting them to the phone. It always seems to get in the way. So, when Bluetooth headsets hit the market I started looking for ones that would stay in my ear, provide decent sound quality, both in the microphone and headset. I quickly discovered that anything that met those criteria hovered around $80-$100 price tag. The ones I liked best was made by Jobra even though I had to use a hook for it to stay on my ear.
As soon as Apple unveiled the AirPods, I wanted a pair. I loved the minimal size and the idea that the case also charged them. But, once I got them I fell in love. Synching to my phone was as easy as pressing a button on the back of the case… That was it. My phone recognized them immediately and I was ready to start using them.
The design of the case is just what you would expect from Apple. You can feel the quality… from the smooth lines to the mechanical lid to the way the air pods slide into place magnetically. The case is about the size of a box of dental floss and fits easily and inconspicuously in my shirt pocket.
Usually I only use one AirPod at a time and get about 4 hours of battery life. If I get low, I swap to the other one. That way I have another 4 hours while the first one charges back up. At my level of use the case only needs charging every three or four days.
My only complaint is that I sometimes leave the house without them….
I solved that by buying a second pair to leave in my car…and at $160 each, that says more about how much I love my AirPods.
The newest version is called AirPod Pro ($249). They are smaller in size, have a longer battery life, noise cancelling capability, and use silicone tips for a better fit….yes I did upgrade and fell in love again.
Do you have girlfriends you can call who will support you in your greatness? Girlfriends who will send you love over the phone or be with you to give you hugs? Girlfriends who understand no justification is necessary and love you even in the mess you may find yourself in?
Girlfriends know what to say and how to be and what to do. They sit when times are tough, they lend an ear when your words won’t stop, they hug when you’re falling down. They laugh from the belly when you do something Crazy. They watch your kids when the sitter leaves you high & dry. They bring a meal when you can’t get out of bed. They cry with you, giggle with you and rant on & on with you. Girlfriends know what to do.
Are you that kind of girlfriend? Do you stop your nonsense to lend a hand? Do you reach out when you’re tired because you know your bestie is having the worst day of her life? Do you care and love and give and hold? It takes a lot to step up and be that kind of friend. It takes courage and compassion and selflessness.
Be the one who someone calls because she knows she can count on you. All Day.
Be the one who puts smiles on faces, sends birthday wishes & opens her arms to others.
Be the one who at the end of the day puts her head on her pillow, down right knowing that she stepped out and gave of herself to another with nothing but honest, authentic giving.
Be Her all day long. Truth. Real. Raw. Your giving opens up space & gives permission for your girlfriends to Be Her too.
Webster’s defines listen as “to give ear to, to hear, to pay attention to, to give something consideration.”
How many of us are actively listening to people, to GOD?Or are we soooo busy with our own agendas and our electronic devices that we have forgotten the fine art of LISTENING??Many things can happen in the silence of us listening, we can hear God’s will for us, we can hear people’s ideas, concerns and needs…we can be thoughtful while we are actively giving attention to someone else.
Attention is life-giving and listening to someone IS giving them your undivided attention, that means no cell phone, no iphone, no ipad, no computer —just you paying attention to them and listening to HEAR what they are really saying.
Lots of times we “listen” and we don’t “hear”—we automatically think we know what the other person is saying so we tune them out before they even get to finish speaking.In sales a good listener does very well, in life a good listener also does very well.People thrive from your attention and everyone wants to be “heard”.
Take quiet time to listen to GOD, to listen for His direction and timing for us—so many times we try to push things in our timing when if we just waited for God’s timing the path would have been so much smoother.
Take a moment and listen to someone today, put everything aside and really listen.You will be glad you did.