Tag Archives: focused

Selfless Self-Care

Self-care. It’s a term we see everywhere nowadays. It’s sprinkled throughout social media posts, magazines, pamphlets at doctor’s offices, fitness facilities, you name it. Self-care isn’t a bad thing at all but today I want to offer perhaps a different perspective on self-care. 

Often times when we see and hear self-care being discussed and promoted it is in the vain of doing something alone and specifically for oneself. It can sometimes have an indulgent type connotation- getting a massage, taking a bath, reading a book, etc. Leisure activities that bring you pleasure and joy are definitely important and necessary to help keep a person sane. And exercising and eating well can definitely be positive forms of self-care as well. But what is often not discussed is a SELFLESS approach to self-care. What do I mean by that?! I mean, what if self-care looked like you moving outside of yourself to care for someone else and set aside your own wishes/desires/time and resources? Often times self-care is self-focused. And sometimes it needs to be, but I’d argue it’s just as important for our self-care to be selfless at times and focus less on us and more on others. 

There have been so many instances where I’ve found that when I am feeling tired and stressed and just downright depleted, but I do an act of love or service for another person, it brings me great joy and reignites me. It helps me refocus and stop feeling down about my circumstances and stress. Sometimes the last thing you want to do is run an errand for a friend or make a meal for a new mama or visit your elderly grandma BUT when we work up the gumption and just do it, we come away feeling blessed, rejuvenated, and so grateful we did it. Why is this?! I think it’s because we as people are designed to not always be so self-focused. We are designed to give and serve others. When the focus is off of us for even just a few hours, it gives us perspective and helps us re-focus on what truly matters. 

Selfless self-care Is SO good for our mental, spiritual, and physical health and well-being. Next time you are feeling totally worn out and stressed out, perhaps find a way to serve someone around you, whether it be at work or in your community. Sometimes the moving outside of ourselves and our own circumstances is exactly what our hearts and souls need to thrive!

Meghan Meredith
HomeBodySoul, Founder
Certified Health & Wellness Coach
Certified Personal Trainer
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How Bad Do You Want It?

Look at your life and pinpoint for yourself some things that you really, really want.  Got them?  Good.  Now tell me how bad do you want them?  Do you want them bad enough to change everything about yourself that stands in the way of you getting them?  Do you want them bad enough to give up your behaviors that don’t work?  Do you want them bad enough to not give up until you get them?

Most people will probably tell you that they want certain things, however,  I would bet that they are not willing to do WHATEVER it takes to get them and that is why they still do not possess the things that they want.  I would also bet that most people don’t even fully understand the concept called ‘whatever it takes’—most people quit at the first sign of difficulty.  There are some people however that don’t quit…the Navy Seals don’t quit and truly self aware people don’t quit either because they know that quitting only perpetuates the circumstances in their lives that they don’t like.

Let’s talk about where most people lose it along the trail of getting what you want…you start out with a business or a goal or a relationship and everything looks kind of groovy at the beginning.  Then we move along in time and obstacles start to appear…the business doesn’t seem like such a good idea, the new relationship looks like a piece of shit, the goal you set out to accomplish looks WAY TOO HARD.  So you start to buy into that you didn’t want it anyway, you start to think of other things that you can do that would be “easier” —we call this the “grass is greener” syndrome—news flash—the grass is NEVER greener somewhere else…smarten up and learn to cultivate your own grass to make it the green that you want it to be—another news flash—this is HARD WORK…it requires commitment, discipline, purposefulness and doing what you said– NO MATTER WHAT.  If you want to win and get the things you want in life then you must go to war with all the things about yourself that don’t work.

Going to war with yourself means that you set out to prevail no matter what.  This means that you must give up paying attention to your ailments, grievances and complaints.  This means that you must only look at what you want… keep focused on the goal, the intention and let go of ANYTHING that is counterproductive to forward motion.  This looks like doing what you said no matter what opinion you have about it, it means not giving attention and energy to what isn’t working, it means NEVER giving up no matter what it looks like all around you…you keep yourself focused on what you want to achieve and you refuse to be swayed by anything that doesn’t get you to where you are going.

This kind of war on your self is not easy, in fact it is very, very difficult and therefore the average person would never even begin to attempt it.  The average person gets stopped in life by the first sign of trouble…they hit the first obstacle and they quit.

In Navy Seal training an average starting class of 80 people ends up to be about 20 or so by the time graduation rolls around…the men that want to be Navy Seals NO MATTER WHAT are the ones that graduate.  In Seal training they are wet, cold, sleep deprived, physically challenged, mentally challenged and pretty much put through what most people have nightmares about—the BEST part of this…they ASK for it…they WANT to go…they strive to EXCEL…they want to be THE BEST…imagine that?  Navy Seal candidates want it so bad that they will do anything to get it.  Would you go through that kind of hell to get what you want?  Are your goals important enough for you to overcome yourself to achieve them?

Any goal or thing worth having is worth whatever challenge you have to go through to get it…that is the beauty inherent in the system of achievement…when you overcome yourself, when you work hard, when you change yourself to achieve something, then you can REALLY HAVE IT…you can REALLY appreciate it, you can feel deserving of it because you know that you EARNED it and it is yours to keep…be it a relationship or a successful business or a degree…whatever.

If you get something and you didn’t work for it the satisfaction of it is very short lived…handouts don’t teach us anything…challenging ourselves to be better teaches us a wisdom that can’t be learned any other way…xoxoxo

Not Giving Attention To Negative Thoughts

Yesterday we talked about replacing  thoughts..  Today I want to talk about what giving attention to negative thoughts will create for you…

Your thoughts are far more powerful than you might imagine and they go forward to create your future.  What you think about, speak about, talk about and give your attention to WILL become your reality, so you have to be very mindful of what you are focused on.

The thoughts that you hold in mind will produce after their own kind and your thoughts will produce an energy field around you that will end up attracting to you the kinds of things that you are thinking.

Remember that character in Peanuts, Pigpen?  He had a dirt cloud that surrounded him wherever he went, crappy thoughts will work like that…they will form a dirty cloud around you and they will begin to attract things that are similar.  Negative circumstances are no mystery; they arrive because we have given too much attention to negative thoughts, worry, fear and doubt.  We will also attract unfavorable circumstances when we are critical, judgmental, angry and ungrateful…like attracts like…that will always be true. Misery loves company.

Thankfully this same principle of ‘like attracts like’ will work in your favor when you start thinking more positive things, when you are grateful and when you focus on what’s good and what works.

There is no EASY button for changing your thinking or for teaching yourself how to stay focused on what you want more of, it requires discipline and work to stay vigilant about your thinking.  However, the results that can be produced by this practice are life-altering…you CAN create the life that you want and the Holiday Season that you want, you just have to be willing to do the work…xoxoxo