I’m sure you have experienced it, the feeling that your entire world is crumbling down around your ears. I call these moments tower moments. In Tarot the tower card depicted above shows and explosive scene of despair and destruction. The tower, and what it symbolizes is a very misunderstood event. In the very moment you feel everything crumbling, whether it be something you worked hard for, or something you feared, it can feel catastrophic, heartbreaking, unfair, or hopeless. If you focus on the destruction of the tower and your disappointment; or you cling to the situation or person that is being forcefully removed to re align you, you will make yourself miserable. You will miss out on the lesson and the blessing god is trying to give you. The more you try to keep the things, people, perspectives, and behaviors that are meant to be removed the more you will have to repeat the tower moment.
It is my belief that the most painful, explosive shifts in our lives are a tool that the power greater than ourselves uses to re align us or wake us up. It’s almost like he’s saying “If I make it louder and more painful maybe she will hear me this time, Maybe she will understand this person or path isn’t meant for her.”
My most recent tower moment was with a career path I went down, and also with someone I considered a dear friend and a family member. I cannot go into too many details Because of my privacy regulations from working as a realtor. I can tell you I poured my heart and soul into becoming a great realtor, I sacrificed and worked myself to the bone without pay. I was very proud of my hard work and I was ecstatic when I landed two listings within a month.
The next three months I had everything set up for both clients. Then the tower moments came. One from bad circumstances, the other was out of nowhere, I lost both listings and my reputation with my business.
The night I found out about the second deal blowing up, I put the kids to bed, then went to try to sleep and audibly sobbed for most of the night. I was so distraught I made myself physically ill and ended up having to call into my part time job the next morning.
The one deal that devastated me the most was the one that came from nowhere, I was ready to throw in the flag. Thankfully I have an amazing support network that helped me wait until I had a clear mind to make a decision. Now I see that whole scenario was ment to remove people from mylife, and re align me with my life’s purpose.
If it weren’t for this earth shattering experience I would still be falling into the same patterns and stuck in a place of non growth. I had become stagnant. I didn’t want to let people dear to me go even though they were unhealthy for me. Now even though I am still mourning the loss of people and things I had wanted, it’s also like a breath of fresh air. I have more room to grow and I am running with it.
Just remember when things look the darkest, and are the most painful, look for the lesson, look for where you need to grow and you will find the light, count your blessing and not your problems. Address those problems within yourself and grow baby grow!
Healing, Growing, Loving