I’m a big fan of memes and one of my favorites is a picture of Steve Carrel from the office it reads:
“I’m not superstitious
But I am a little stitious”
Yup that’s me. With a lot of things in my life. But the biggie is when good things happen.
Superstitious-I don’t trust good things. I wait for that other shoe to drop. I could use my track record as my excuse but I think it’s deeper than that.
Somewhere along the way just like asking for help. I was made to feel I don’t deserve good things.
I don’t mean daily massages or an unlimited spending allowance at Sephora.
Although, I wouldn’t mind those things.
But rather being recognized for a job well done. When I’m praised at work I always say thank you, but say I didn’t do it alone. I don’t deserve the credit. Even if I really do.
When I got asked to speak at a conference recently, I instantly thought it was because they couldn’t find anyone else. Not that maybe I’m a good speaker.
I blush at compliments.
I get teary at the littlest things.
As much as I want good things and want to hear I’m awesome, sparkly, be loved…
When it happens I don’t know what to do with it. I question it. I analyze it. I don’t always trust it. I wait for it to fall apart.
Luckily and I’ve alluded to my dream team before. My group of friends scold me when I start to question things too much. I have a person who holds my hand and teases me- “don’t cry” and kisses the top of my head.
It’s a slippery slope we Moms traverse. We want so much for everyone around us, why can’t we want that for ourselves?
I’m working on being less stitious. Believing in myself and not letting that self doubt and some bumps from my past make me freeze.
It’s ok to want good things.
Say it with my Mommas.
“It’s ok to want good things”.
Just in case you start to get a little superstitious… I’ll be here reminding you… you deserve good things.
You really do.