Tag Archives: conversation

So It Begins

And so it begins…Earlier this week as I was getting ready for work my daughter noticed the sweatshirt I was wearing and announced she wanted it.

Luckily I have more than one version of said sweatshirt and I pulled the one I wasn’t wearing from its hanger and handed it to her.

She clapped her hands put it on and was attached to it for the better part of three days until I finally snuck into her room and threw it in our hamper.

As I type this- I’m smiling. My daughter is twelve and she has hit that stage where she asks if I am going to leave when I am in her room too long.

So her wanting a piece of my clothing and wearing it consecutively for three days … it goes without saying it meant a lot to me.

Twelve has been hard.

She has started middle school- her second year actually. Conversations that I avoided in an attempt to protect her are happening, because she has friends who are vocal about their parents situations.

Thankfully we have been able to have some frank conversations without me having to paint anyone as better or worse. Because at the end of the day,at least right now all she needs to know is we just didn’t work. Sometimes opposites do not attract lol.

But getting back to this clothes borrowing thing. It is allowing me stolen moments. Shy conversations about friends, teachers and people she likes or doesn’t.

It’s interesting that bonding over a sweatshirt is helping us bond. Maybe it’s not the sweatshirt, maybe it’s me. I am petrified as we continue our journey closer to the numbers ending in teen we could have a strained relationship. The cliches exist for a reason. G also carries the added weight of trying to manage two households. She shouldn’t have to but it’s our reality.

What I do know is if letting her borrow my clothes means she shares more moments and snippets of her life with me. Well, aside from maybe one or two pair of boots she can raid my closet anytime.

Sending you lots of love Mommas.

<3 Caprise

An Encouraging Word

Never underestimate the value of an encouraging word.

The simple act of encouragement is so often taken for granted.  So many of us want to believe that we encourage our family, our friends, our co-workers and our general fellow man.  Sadly, though, many of us fall short.

Think about your everyday conversations.  Do you listen and smile casually, leaving yourself with the impression that you’ve participated in the conversation in an encouraging manner, when you haven’t really offered any encouragement at all?

Have you asked questions about the potential negative outcomes of a friend’s excited effort under the guise of “helping them think it through”, unknowingly (and, in all fairness, most likely unintentionally) crushing their excitement instead of offering encouragement?  Or, have you in fact shared an encouraging word commending someone for a job well done or offering them a word that says “I know you’ll succeed in this venture”?

Many of us listen to and participate in conversations and, when we leave said conversation, truly believe we have been an encouragement to the other party / parties involved in the conversation.  However, if we take a hard, honest and objective look at these same conversations, we will find that we haven’t really been of any encouragement at all.  Sometimes, we have in fact been the opposite or completely neutral.

At various points in my life, I have been blessed to have some genuinely encouraging people in my circles.  I would venture to say that they have been quite scattered, but present nonetheless, and the difference it has made in my life is absolutely priceless.  Several years back, I went through a dark period that left me very unhappy and in possession of very little self-confidence.  Having people in my life then that were constantly encouraging me was such a blessing.  It’s not that they were necessarily going out of their way to come up with extra things to say in each shared conversation, but these people truly made a habit of being encouraging to the point that it was simply a part of who they are.  Having this kind of people in my life has really broadened my appreciation for words of encouragement.  I find myself being more encouraging to others as well, which is just a happy little side effect.

You never know how big an effect the smallest words can have on someone’s day, someone’s week or even someone’s life.

Take a moment to really think about your everyday conversations and see where you may have room to work some encouragement into your own daily life.  I guarantee you the benefits will be reaped by not only those you encourage, but by you as well.


You can follow me at sunshineandbluemoon.blogspot.com and, as always, make it a great day!


Power Of Words And Their Affect

I am wondering today if people really understand the power of ‘words’, do people understand that their words are living breathing pieces of consciousness that go forward to either harm or to help?  This week I had another experience with a person that uses their power of words to hurt and to wound and to cut the legs out from under the person that they are attacking…this person has done so much damage with their word power, caused so much distress, wreaked so much havoc…one might think “oh they are only words”, however, wish to admit it or not words have an incredible power…they run over and over in your head and that gives them extensive amounts of life after the fight, after the conversation, after the attack…

There are words both kind and unkind that still run through my head from years past…every once in awhile a sentence said resurfaces and along with it the emotions that were present during the interaction…I’m sure this is true for all of us…we are all aware that you can’t take back words…you can apologize, but you can’t undo them…once they are out of your mouth the damage or the gift is done.

I wonder if this person that I know of feels happy after they have systematically punished and attacked the ‘enemy’—do you think they look in the mirror and feel glee for the hurt and harm they have caused?  Or do you think they have a heavy heart from being the cause of so much turmoil???  I really wonder…

We all have moments where harsh and harmful words escape our lips, we all have things that we wish we could take back, we have all done damage by allowing reactive words to escape us unchecked…hell I know I have…in my younger years I had a much harsher tongue than I do now…I have learned over time that mostly it is best to stay quiet when reactive and angry…much more class, style and grace in standing down and walking away then in engaging in a full-fledged assault…when unkind words are flinging people can’t hear anyway…

I think people do the best they can for who they are and when we encounter a person that is hurtful and harmful it is best to stay away from them for no amount of us yelling and screaming and counter-attacking is going to help them at all…it just feeds their reactive nature and brings more chaos…

There is an incredible amount of power in forgiving and moving on…it is a very freeing practice…

This week this person that I know of has helped me to remember that words are alive and they can either bring harm or help, break-down or build-up…and for that I thank them…

We all need to think before we speak and really decide if the harsh words we have to share are worth the damage that they could do…so think today before you send that email or make that phone call or write that letter, make sure that whatever you have to say forwards the action of life…God knows there are enough wars that we are fighting with real enemies, we don’t need to be fighting each other…