Tag Archives: comfort zone

Back In The Pool

Going back in the pool.

I have gently alluded to what I’m about to write about in a few blogs.

It’s a tricky thing when you write a blog like this. On one hand I know by sharing there is a chance I may help someone or make someone laugh. On the other hand I am putting a piece of me and sometimes someone else out in the universe.

That is hard enough to do normally but when you are a person who like me is incredibly guarded… let’s just say every week when I submit these I’m surprised by what I share.

However, in this case I have a blessing and strong encouragement so away we go.

So I’m dating again.

Not plural.

Just one person. He was a surprise and the more I get to know him the more I want to know him. I have broken a lot of rules for him and let me just say he is the most patient human.

He also likes to get me to get outside of my comfort zone.

For example eating at a restaurant I normally wouldn’t choose like…

Hooters.

Are you laughing yet?

Maybe rolling your eyes.

Or perhaps raising your fist in solidarity?

Here’s the thing while in college, I had a handful of friends who made quite a living off of working at Hooters. But I just could never see myself eating there.

Until a few weeks ago.

Him: Wanna get dinner tonight?

Me: Yes please

Him: How do you feel about wings?

Me: Love ‘em

Him: See ya at Hooters at 630

Me: (in a squeak…) ok

Him: You will be fine, seriously the food is good.

Me: Sure

I met him in the parking lot and he gave me his normal bear hug and kiss on my forehead. Held my hand and away we went.

As soon as the young ladies at the host stand said Welcome to Hooters… my face. So red.

Here’s the thing.

A couple actually… Hooters now (I’m going to go out on a limb) is decidedly different than the Hooters from my college days. Let’s start with the outfits, there were men working there, families (!) eating there and yes Mommas the wings were really good.

So much so, that when I left with my person I said I would come back, and I would.

But this isn’t really about Hooters.

It’s about stepping outside your comfort zone. It is easy to not try new things because you’re afraid or you believe it may be a certain way. Like for example- dating.

I am not going to tell you dating as a single parent is rough. You know.

I am not going to tell you dating as a woman of a certain age isn’t scary. You know that too.

I am not going to tell you that it’s a lot to put yourself out there after being made to feel like a failure by someone who didn’t deserve you. You know.

What I will tell you …

I am learning there is someone in my life who makes me feel more beautiful at 47 than I ever did at 25. Who asks about my day. Wants to know my G. Can tell when I’m sad. Surprises me. Supports my dreams. Sends me music.

Makes me teary as I write this- because for the first time in a long time I am not afraid to talk about a future. I can actually see it.

And yes, makes me want to break more rules.

I still have a life jacket near the edge of the proverbial pool,but I don’t know Mommas, kinda glad I got some wings at Hooters.

 

<3 Caprise

Willing To Do Whatever It Takes…

‘Willing to do whatever it takes’ is a concept foreign to many, which explains why most people do not have the results that they want in life.  ‘Willing to do whatever it takes’ means just what it says “whatever it takes”…this may mean staying up all night to get the job done, it may mean making cold calls when you don’t feel like it, it may mean helping someone if you aren’t in the mood, it may mean getting up at 5am to work on your goals before you start your day.  It certainly means making yourself uncomfortable in some way, “whatever it takes” is never easy and it never feels good, however it WILL enable you to execute the results you seek.

Sadly, most people that think they work so hard are actually working within their comfort zone, and then they wonder why their HUGE, AUDACIOUS goals never come to pass.  Working within your comfort zone will net you the same circumstances and results that you have always had.  If things are not moving along the way you want them to, then you are not doing enough to create momentum.  Momentum is difficult to create, yet once it starts rolling it will knock down everything in its path and you can keep it moving with consistent focused effort. 

If you have a goal that you want to complete then you must be willing to do whatever it takes to make that happen.  Do not let anyone deter you, delay you or distract you…keep your head down and stay focused on doing whatever needs to be done.  Executing results is not impossible, it simply requires consistency, commitment and a willingness to do ‘whatever it takes’.  That means no more excuses, only results.

This will be an unpopular way to behave in most circles because the majority of people prefer to offer reasons and excuses instead of results, so if you are truly committed to doing something different you may need to change the company you keep.