Girls, whenever you question WHY….Why is it like this… With upset in your voice, anguish in your heart and tears on your cheeks… STOP. Stop and remember it is YOU who can make a change from feeling a MESS to feeling at PEACE.
Let’s just say you really did get pushed down the stairs. You really were in a car accident. You really did go through a devastating divorce. BUT just because it really did happen to you, doesn’t mean it has to mold you, effect you, victimize you or keep you in a negative mind space or feeling a MESS.
As mush as you decide what to eat, where to shop, what to wear on any given day…. You also have the power to decide what to think & speak & how to respond to situations and what’s going on around you.
Years ago I was going to Survivors of Suicide support groups. I lost a loved one and was eager to work through the pain and upset to a place of ‘joy in the sadness’. I was on a mission to heal, a journey of releasing the trauma. I was not going to let his depression become my depression. I was determined to get on the other side of my grief.
During one of the meetings a woman was sharing. She was sooooo mad at her dad. Mad because he had taken his life and she was a MESS as a result of it. She shared her story, her weight gain, her anger, her solitude & that her dad died 14 years ago. She’d been coming to Survivors of Suicide meetings for 14 years!!! I think my jaw may have dropped wide open right there, in that moment. I’d been coming for 2 months and I thought “I Will Not Be Here For One Year, Never Mind Fourteen.”
Do you see? She kept going to the meetings, sharing her misery, talking about her upset, living IN that MESSY place. The more she shared, the more support she got, the more drama she shared, the more it coddled her and brought her comfort and justified her anger. Which, if that worked for her….all the power to her. BUT, Did she know she had the power within herself to change the way she was thinking? It could’ve changed in a conversation, in a decision, in a promise.
Next time you find yourself asking WHY, oh Why am I in this MESS? Remember that you can make it new.
There is no reason to sit in it.
Your God girl