Tag Archives: broke

Reclaiming My Missing Pieces

I am reclaiming my missing pieces. The first time I stopped liking something because of a broken heart I was in high school. I was a big fan of a certain variety of Liz Claiborne perfume. My ex boyfriend’s new girlfriend wore it too.  If I remember correctly I threw out almost a full bottle. It goes without saying my working class parents were livid. It was not inexpensive, but I couldn’t bear to smell like her.

In the years that followed music.

Movies

TV shows

Restaurants

Type of foods

Even certain objects.

This one is easily the most embarrassing I have a beautiful charm necklace. It’s simple but it has my three favorite things on it: a shoe, cassette tape, a unicorn.  I stopped wearing because a woman who was hitting on my boyfriend at the time was obsessed with unicorns.

As I type this I realize that was ridiculous, but when you are hurting or are hurt you find ways to run away from it. Protect yourself. Even if it means sacrificing some of your favorite things.

You know I even changed my hair because I didn’t want to have the same haircut as someone who had hurt me?

And truth be told, it’s a great haircut.

Not only do women drastically change their appearance to get over a broken heart so women give away pieces of themselves. I am starting to realize those pieces I gave away I should have held onto tightly. By tucking them away or throwing them away, I was letting the people who hurt me, hurt me even more.

I might add, that girl in high school had no idea she cost my parents $50 and I can’t imagine she’d care.

I ended up with a really awful hairstyle for awhile there.

Really awful.

The only person who suffered was me.

Sometimes it is good to give certain things up. Truly. You do need to walk away from memories or things to protect your heart, but what I’m learning in my old age is don’t give YOURSELF away.

I love unicorns. I love that necklace. I got it with one of my best friends. That is what I should focus on.

I enjoy an expensive perfume but I’ve outgrown Liz Claiborne as have millions of women.

I was listening to Brass in Pocket with my Dad long before I met that Lacrosse player who broke my heart, he doesn’t deserve our song.

There are still songs I avoid and if certain movies are on I change the channel,but now it’s because of me, not them.

Heartbreak is a slippery slope Mommas and I am by no means a sage but this is what I know…

If you love that song listen to it loudly

If that perfume smells fantastic wear it.

Be really sure about bangs.

Really sure

Those things were yours long before the heartbreak. But if it hurts too much maybe don’t toss them but find a beautiful box to keep them in until you’re ready to bring them back into your life.

In the meantime Mommas remember who you are. You are- as I like to say magical. Truly. You have other humans who count on you and love you with their whole heart regardless of what kind of perfume you wear.

 

Much love Mommas

<3Caprise

Cheers to the ‘Broken’ People…

Broken people and by ‘broken’ I mean that you have lived through things that didn’t work out the way you intended, relationships that broke apart, people that betrayed you, let you down, disappointed you. Or you have literally lived through being broke as hell and clawed your way up out of that. Or you were faced with something that you thought you couldn’t survive and YOU DID. By ‘broken’ I mean that things broke apart, that the perfect picture in your head was shattered into a million little bits and you had to recreate it, you had to get up and go to work anyway…you had to take care of your kid or kids anyway…you had to dry your tears, swallow your anger and get back out there and play ball.

 

Cheers to us, the ‘broken’ people…because we are stronger, fiercer, wiser, smarter and more well prepared for REAL living than the people that fall down and get into bed at the first sign of trouble, the ones who cry and whine about how life isn’t fair, the people that think life is a movie with no shitty scenes—those people will have a hard time in this life, they can’t cope…when the shit hits the fan for them or the wind blows their hair out of place or someone swears at them, they come undone, they crumble, they fall down and have no strength to get up and figure it out.

 

We are not like that…we can face down the devil himself if we have to, swords drawn ready to do battle…we are the warriors…we are the people you want standing watch over your soul, we are the ones that can turn any circumstance around because we know that life is what you make of it. If you hand us lemons we will make the best damn lemonade that you ever had and we will drink it with you, celebrating all the way.

 

So STOP wondering why your life isn’t perfect, stop thinking that there is something wrong with you because stuff is happening in your life and start standing strong in who you are. Start understanding that your ‘brokenness’ means that you are stronger than you ever imagined, that you can face down any obstacle, conquer any fear. Let the perfect people have their perfect lives, we know the truth…at the first sign of trouble they are done for and then they will be seeking out the warriors to figure out how to survive.

We are stronger in the broken places, every time we were bent to the ground our roots grew stronger and now nothing can knock us down…so CHEERS to us