Tag Archives: believe in yourself

Sometimes You Need A Moment

This past weekend my Mom’s family had a get together. My uncle who has lived in England for decades was visiting. Emails were sent out and somehow my Mom’s siblings of which there are seven, (there were nine but my aunt and uncle passed away several years ago) and children and grandchildren all converged on my favorite uncle’s property for food and a visit.

It was pretty fantastic. My daughter who is an only child had my cousins kids who are close to her age and ironically have similar interests to hang around with, throw in one of my considerably younger cousins who took it upon herself to dote on them all and a lesson in driving a tractor… my kid was in heaven.

For me it was about being with my family. July which is thankfully over, was full of one thing after another. All out of my control and increasingly worse than the other. Normally I pray for July to last all summer, I prayed for August to get here instead.

Needless to say July wore me out.

That suitcase I told you all to push back under the bed a few weeks ago in another blog. I started to get it out. Thought about opening it.

Then the family get together happened. The suitcase was peeking out under the bed.

Then a moment happened. There were several actually, but this one has stuck.

My uncle the one visiting from across the pond who the last time I saw him I was married, came and sat down next down to me.

He started it off with “I was surprised to hear about your divorce”.

I instantly tensed up.

He continued… “but emotional abuse is hard. It gets in your head. Being slagged on day in and day out. You start to believe it,even when it’s not true. Words hurt. I don’t care what anyone says. They stick with you. No one deserves that.

You seem happy and life is treating you well and that is what you deserve”.

Even now as I write this I don’t think I can explain how much that meant. How much that conversation, that moment meant.

Because, sadly my reality over the years is most people just have not understood.

When your marriage fails it’s hard enough, but I never want to be the person who bad mouths my ex husband. Regardless of what happened during our marriage because he is still my daughter’s Dad.

But there were hurts.

There are still hurts.

I hope some day they will be less.

I hope some day I look in the mirror and I don’t second guess what I see. I don’t second guess what I say. I don’t doubt who I am. I continue to get back to being the badass I like to trick

everyone into believing I am.

I also want you to remember who you are Mommas. Grab those magic moments.

Look in the mirror and roar.

Love the sound of your voice.

Believe in who you are.

You are someone’s Momma and that means you are a magical badass.

<3Caprise

Today Is The Day I Begin To Reach High

Today I am starting a journal, not only will this be a journal but a life changing assignment for myself. Today I am one step closer to be a braver woman, mother, friend and all-around person.

I have never thought of myself as a brave person. I have ALWAYS been the quiet one. The one everyone doesn’t see. The one who tries not to be called on for ANYTHING. The one who agrees with EVERYTHING just, so I don’t have to debate about it.

When Hurricane Harvey hit, my world was devastated. I have never been through something like that before. It changed my whole aspect on who I was. All I wanted to do was help people. But how was I supposed to help anyone when I have been scared all my life? Well, your girl has set her sights high now.

With my new career insights and pushing and pulling against all odds, it seems I still find things that push me back. But this is more than ok because this is only a test. I must keep pushing outside my comfort zones. As time goes by I keep changing into a whole new person and I am loving it. I am more outgoing, happier, trying new things and making new friends.

“Brave people don’t stop hearing the whispers of fear. They hear the whispers but take action anyways.” This is my goal. To keep fighting, keep pushing with everything to accomplish that I am setting my mind too. With the help of my friends, family and the words of the Lord I shall succeed!

I believe in myself. Do you believe in yourself? I believe all we need is that one whisper to get us up and motivated. Still scared? I am here, to help push you, help you find the meaning you may be looking for.

Today is the day to begin Reaching High.

~Shelly