Megan Antonio lived in a toxic, negative, abusive space for so many years, where darkness plagued her mind, that she lost the lackluster of the world and fell prey to the darkness. She got so accustomed to it, that she began to believe….it WAS the way life IS. UNTIL….
….her mom passed away and she was healed.
….her stepfather passed and she found God.
….her heart said no more and let go.
….her worth erupted from the depths and it became her truth.
Molested as a kid by her stepfather and then having to keep everything a big secret, and living with the shame & guilt for decades, she became a young alcoholic.
Megan was a people pleaser and got caught up in the uncertainty of it all. When she finally started to speak up, others didn’t believe her, her mother didn’t listen to her and her counselor chalked it up to being her problem. She started to dabble with drugs, which made matters worse.
She got married to the first guy who asked and then 2 kids later, she felt stuck. The marriage was great for a while, but the toxicity became unbearable. The dysfunctional roller coaster of drama, chaos & love kept chugging along the tracks. Marriage. Children. Separation. Upset. Reconciliation. Miscarriage. Hubby Fired. New address. Hubby Arrested. Her School. His Infidelity. Quit school. His DUI. Turmoil. New address. Jail. Mom passed away. So much for a young mom to deal with….back and forth and over and over. One day life was great, the next, the sky was falling. All the ups & downs started to take it’s toll on her well-being ,never mind their relationship. She tried every which way to make it work, to try one more time, to try and please him even still.
She recalls when she was getting her car serviced on her way to her stepdads funeral to read the liturgy, remember she’s a people pleaser, & although she spoke, she doesn’t remember much. She was praying to have a better life, better quality, be free from the turmoil, the upsets & the messy life. So many things grabbed her attention. All she knew to do was pray.
And God heard her.
He put a woman in her path who reminded Megan of her mom. They met at that gas station. A simple hello and a smile turned into a conversation which turned into a friendship. The woman spoke to Megan with love & through the tough conversation, she showed Megan that the common denominator was her. And change for something better, was up to her.
So, the 2nd time her husband landed in jail, she left him in there. She packed up everything she had into her suburban with her 2 boys and off they went to begin anew. Her friends helped her move in so she could move on. She was able to finally let go of pleasing everyone. Taking care of herself and her 2 boys were the most important things in her life, and she knew it was up to her.
So much growth happened from the beginning of the sentences to the end of the sentences. The impact this woman had on her life was huge. She’ll never know what she did for Megan and how she gained the courage to be bold and make a change. And reminded her of what she knew as a child “JESUS LOVES YOU.”
She gets it now and believes with all her heart if she didn’t’ go through those parts of her life, her suffering AND her healing would not have been so profound. She trusts that God is harsh if he needs to be and it’s all in His timing. She grew up knowing God, but something was different this time. She is stronger, confident, volunteering, setting goals, loving herself and creating a wonderful life for her boys.
Being a single mom is not easy, but every day she focuses on providing for them along with spending quality time with them. She says “If I’m always working, I’d miss what’s going on in my own home.” And that’s much too important to her to miss. Her boys bring so much joy to the world and she is forever grateful.
Her life is true, real and raw. Along with raising her boys she makes sure to find time for herself doing things that fill her heart up with solace & grace. She recently hired a sitter so she could spend time with girlfriends. A few of her “Dates With Me” are long walks, pedicures and spending time with God. She’s a better mom when she loves on herself and these days “happy” hangs out at her house a lot more. PLUS…. good things are happening.
She is smart, she is blessed & she can do anything.
~Interview and write up was completed by Tracy