Living life on Life Avenue….the disappointment that we incur as a result of an unmet expectation is usually our fault, our problem, our unrealistic view. Now that does not mean ‘don’t expect anything’… what it means is… Don’t let it ruin your day. Don’t get disappointed about it. At least not the kind of disappointment that keeps you in bed with a tear-soaked pillow or the kind that keeps you returning to the fridge for yet…. another scoop of ice cream.
Especially if it was an expectation that YOU put upon someone else without even telling them that you expected it. In my younger years in my dating life, I had sooooo many unspoken expectations in regards to ‘him’. AND it ruined much. If the man I was dating didn’t line up with my expectations of him, if he didn’t act the way I expected him to….. he was out! Gone! Done!
What WAS that!?
1) who the heck was I to be so brutally cold ?
2) where in the world did that attitude of mine come from ?
3) who on earth did I think I was ?
I remember one time I was dating this great guy. I’m talking GREAT. He made me laugh all the time. We grooved together. It just worked. Until one day…we went to a party and he got so drunk that I had to drive us home. That was it. We were DONE. It was over. I was OUT! He did not know what hit him. He had no idea that his behavior would end US… as he told me, “I would NEVER have done that, if I knew this is where I would be now.” He figured in his own mind that it was no big deal….since I wasn’t drinking it was safe for him to get toasted and I would easily drive. WELL, that’s not went on in my own mind.
Only when I was older did I realize how messed up that was. Now I know I have the power to say what I like, what I want, what I hope for in a mate. To actually have a grown-up conversation about how to make the relationship work, for both of us, so it would actually last rather than be DONE because of unspoken expectations.
Ohhhhh the lessons we learn while on Life Avenue!
Your God girl