Begin in a friendly way….Years ago, when Dale Carnegie was a barefoot boy walking through the woods to a country school in northwest Missouri, he read a fable about the sun and the wind. It serves as a vivid reminder of the power of this principle of earning others’ trust. The sun and wind debated about which was the stronger, and the wind said, “I’ll prove I am. See the old man down there with a coat? I bet I can get his coat off him quicker than you can.” So the sun went behind a cloud, and the wind blew until it was almost a tornado, but the harder it blew, the tighter the old man clutched his coat to him. Finally the wind calmed down and gave up, and then the sun came out from behind the clouds and smiled kindly on the old man. Presently, the man mopped his brow and pulled off his coat. The sun then reminded the wind that gentleness and friendliness were always stronger than fury and force. – quoted from How To Win Friends And Influence People In The Digital Age
Remember to always begin in a friendly way.
Some people have asked “isn’t that manipulative if you don’t feel friendly?” The answer is yes it is. The importance with all of Dale Carnegie’s advice is to be genuine and sincere. If you can’t do that, wait until you can. The hard truth is that the issue you might have with someone has little to do with them.
Gary Vanerchuk says “Engagement has to be heartfelt, or it won’t work. . . . You cannot underestimate people’s ability to spot a soulless, bureaucratic tactic a million miles away. It’s a big reason why so many companies that have dipped a toe in social media waters have failed miserably.”
You are a good person, prove it.