Author Archives: staff

I Never Forgot When Someone Told Me This

“Write something that someone told you about yourself that you never forgot.”

Day 2 of the 30 Day Writing Challenge:

I have been told plenty of things by others about myself, most of them transparent and generic. Kind words but probably not genuine. The things you’re suppose to say in certain situations. I am guilty of doing that as well.

There is one person in particular who has always told me that he believes in me. I am a vocal, independent woman who has had some made for tv moments and years in my life. I have been beaten down, broken, spiteful, bitter and angry. I have huge shoulders and carry a lot of personal weight and responsibility for others in my life and sometimes I just need a turn and need the support of someone too. He often tells me he believes in me and that is just enough to get me back where I need to be. I believe him, I know he does, and I also know that If I fail or fall he will still believe in me. He believes in the person that I am and the person that I strive to be. He is genuine and shows it daily. He is not generic and transparent and he proves this every day. And the reason I believe him is because he is here with me through every good and bad moments of mine, accepts that those moments are his too and we share the excitement, pain, sadness, and joy together. He believes in me and I believe in him. I will never forget. His constant belief in me has helped me believe in myself.

Love to All-Kim

 

 

Writing For You And Me

Writing is not my thing. I love to talk and feel like I have sound advice when visiting with friends. I must admit when Noelle came to me and asked if I would help blog post a few days of the week my anxiety skyrocketed. There is plenty of stuff going on in my head and I can always seem to find something to talk about. My kids say that I will carry on lengthy conversations with perfect strangers. I don’t know how to put all those thoughts and conversations into words and transfer it to paper so it can be sarcastic when needed, funny as called for, and so on. What do our followers want to hear or what would I be able to offer? I started searching on my ever favorite Pinterest for writing prompts, journaling, challenges. I found some useful information and also some useless. It still doesn’t tell me what YOU would like to see/read.  I am not exactly convinced that I am all that interesting 😉

This is where I want to ask you to be involved. I found a 30 day writing challenge and am going to do it, I would LOVE for you to join me. If you want to share your answers please feel free to do so! I feel like maybe this is a way for us to get to know each other some.

My Day 1 is today and my top 10 things that make me happy are:

  1. God
  2. Husband
  3. Children
  4. Health
  5. Extended Family
  6. Friends
  7. Financial Stability
  8. Job
  9. Chocolate
  10. Bread

What are yours?

 

Love to All-Kim

Being Grateful Even When You Don’t Feel It

Being grateful on those days and periods of your life where everything is just a perceived disaster can prove to be beyond difficult.

I spent a lot of my earlier adult years being pissed off at everything, huge chip on my shoulder for what I thought was the crappy cards I was dealt. Angry about my childhood and how much I felt it wasn’t fair, marrying my “high school sweetheart” only for it to fail less than two years after being married, not taking advantage of the opportunity I had to go to college, the list continues on. And maybe I was dealt some crappy cards throughout my youth, I made the decision to get married when we both knew it shouldn’t of been. I made the choice to not go to college at that point in my life. Somewhere along the years I decided that I was not going to continue feeling sorry for myself, it was a huge burden on my mental and physical health, relationships with family members and peers. I was lonely, depressed, angry, bitter, and hateful. My friends and family would avoid me and I knew it, at this point I didn’t know why but eventually a close friend finally told me that I was a “Debbie-Downer”(that’s putting it nice). She left that night and I was hurt, and still angry-probably even more angry after that conversation and of course it wasn’t my fault-it was theirs. Couldn’t they see that I had a crappy childhood?!? Didn’t they see that my marriage was a disaster from the get go?!?! I cried, I cussed, and everything else someone does when they are hurt and angry. And honest to God something dawned on me that night-this is not who I am nor who I want to be.  I needed to wake up each morning and be grateful for at least one thing, and write that one thing down, EVERY DAMN DAY! Grateful that I have the option to get up every day, grateful that I can write, grateful that I have something to write with, and something to write on.

There is ALWAYS something to be grateful for in each and every day. And maybe one day it’s making it another day-think about that, let that sink in. You are alive!

Love to All-Kim

Are You Building A Legacy?

Gurdjieff ([1877-1949], priest, physician, teacher, author of ‘Meetings With Remarkable Men’) tells us that to live in a truly creative and dynamic way; we would have to think in a completely new way.  He encourages that to be completely fulfilled, we must engage in our own conscious evolution. In his work he also speaks about conscious labor and intentional suffering and about the importance of undertaking the burden of responsibility for serving the future…in other words building a legacy…

Gurdjieff’s student J.G. Bennett  “…adopted as a major theme of his life and work the teaching known as “The Fourth Way”. This is very simply that in the face of a threat, whether environmental disaster, war and conquest, or economic collapse, those persons who are able to do so must accept the responsibility of guiding and supporting the less resourceful, but not through the conventional institutions of government or religion, but rather on the level of new ideas and attitudes, inspiration and spiritual regeneration. As many Sufi teachers have done, he hinted at a world of experience in which the laws are quite other than those governing the material world – in some cases, the reverse. Those who are able to decipher this riddle must inevitably dedicate themselves to serving humanity, and the future of our world.” (www.jgbennett.net)

Those of us that understand that there is far more to life than what we can physically “see”, understand also that we have a responsibility to encourage other people not to be limited by their own thinking.  I speak often of the fact that you should never, ever judge or evaluate a situation by the way that it looks in any given moment—you should only ever operate from your intention about what the outcome will be.  So many people are stopped in their tracks because they think that the obstacles they encounter are “real”…they fail to understand that what makes obstacles “real” is believing that they exist.  There are people that are never stopped, people that never quit…if one way gets blocked up they find another…these are the people that succeed and know how to live ‘outside the box’…these are the kind of people you want to know.

I mostly live in a conversation called ‘what’s next…what else needs doing’, the past few weeks I have been living in a question called, “What is your Legacy?”

It is interesting that when you begin to engage in this discussion your life and what you have done or not done shows up in a whole different light…complaints and grievances don’t hold much water in the Legacy conversation…25 years after you’re dead nobody is going to care that your back hurt or you had a cold or a headache or that you were too tired to do the laundry.   Some people have told me that their children are their legacy and that is certainly true for all of us that are parents, however, for me that isn’t enough.

I want to leave something that breathes on long after I checked out…something that is dedicated to making people’s lives better, something that educates people and teaches them how to succeed…something that helps those that need helping…something that can be carried forward …something that makes a difference…

My life will change from living in the question, “What is your Legacy?”…do me a favor and take a moment to answer that question for yourself…honestly.  How are you giving back, who are you helping, and what are you serving besides yourself?  How do you serve the future?

I have a theory that if people lived in these questions life would take on a whole new meaning…if people lived for a purpose bigger than themselves the small annoyances they suffer would become much less significant.

Certainly not the average conversation, but average conversations never create much growth or much action—they also don’t cause you to think much.  I leave you with my favorite quote by George Bernard Shaw:

This is the true joy in life, the being used for a purpose recognized by yourself as a mighty one; the being thoroughly worn out before you are thrown on the scrap heap; the being a force of Nature instead of a feverish selfish little clod of ailments and grievances complaining that the world will not devote itself to making you happy.

 

George Bernard Shaw, Man and Superman, Epistle Dedicatory

  • written by Noelle (in case you couldn’t tell)

 

5 Ways to Create A Memory Space

Creating A Memory Space

I have always been sentimental since childhood and have kept various memory boxes throughout the years. Twenty one years ago I attended my first workshop and was introduced the concept of creating a mindful or intentional “Memory Space”.  That weekend gave me clarity about why I felt the deep desire to keep certain items around me and why I derived such comfort and pleasure from them.

As you can imagine I have had many over the years and they tend to change or rotate at various times. I know most of us are extremely busy, life today moves at a much faster clip and we don’t always take the time to mindfully create a space that is just for “Us”. I’m sure some of you might even say to yourself, who has the time or space.

From personal experience, I can share that it is so worth the time and it can take as little as 10 minutes or it can be an ongoing process that evolves as you do.

The most important part of creating your space in my opinion is making it an intentional activity and not seeing it as another “thing” you have to do.

There is no wrong way to create your Memory Space as it is a very personal practice and will be different for everyone. During this time in my life I have several all representing different aspects of what is important to me and what I want to create intentions for. By no means am I saying you need to have several, however I really believe having a space dedicated to what brings your heart joy will add richness to your days.  Examples…one for memories concerning your children or one for memories concerning family or people close to your heart.

Based on your preference, these can be created in a ‘public’ place in your home or office where it is seen by all or it can be completely personal and tucked away in a place for your eyes only.

You may want to create this as your sanctuary, a place to pray, set an intention, meditate, or simply gaze at the objects that bring you joy.

Someone once told me that ”a memory space is a place of non-ordinary reality held within ordinary reality.’

Now don’t get overwhelmed in thinking it needs to be in the perfect place or a certain size. It can be large or as small as your night stand, it could even be located inside a cabinet or a closet.

For those who have one or may know a little about them, as your might be aware, there are many types and ways of doing this. I suggest that those interested in learning more to do research. There is a plethora of information out there.

My intention is, for those of you new to this concept; to make it as simple and enjoyable as possible. It is something I love and really wanted to share as my first blog.

So let’s begin!

  1. Find a space in your home that feels most comfortable and that you will want to spend time at or at least, that you will be able to see every day.
  2. Be in a peaceful mindset as you de-clutter, clean and prepare the surface.
  3. Find a cloth, scarf, or any type of covering that feels special or is symbolic to you.
  4. Set your intention and or purpose for the space – some examples could be that you want to honor loved ones who have passed on, recall moments of joy that you have had or simply just have a space to put your favorite things. It can also be a combination of any and all of the above.
  5. Give thanks and gratitude as you place each object in the space.

Some suggestions for object you might want to consider;

  • A candle
  • Stones or shells that hold special memories.
  • Personal items that have meaning to you.
  • Crystals – always a favorite
  • Artwork, either your own or loved ones, favorite postcards or anything visual that inspires you.
  • Photographs of family, friends, beloved ones, places you either been or want to travel too.
  • Statues and or talismans any symbol that represents peace and tranquility.
  • Flowers, plants or any living thing like a fish. A fish is a symbol of prosperity.
  • Any special texts, words of wisdom or your favorite book.

Always remember that this is YOUR Space, trust that your intuition will guide you to create exactly what is needed in this moment. When you spend time or gaze upon your Memory Space, honor who you are and how far you have come.

Wishing you all that your heart desires!

Kirsten

Questions or Comments kirsten@fortunatopartners.com

 

 

Be Complete In Every Moment…

A dear friend of mine had an unexpected loss recently…a family member had died unexpectedly in the middle of the night from a heart attack…She called to tell me and I just kept saying over and over “Oh my God” and then I started to cry.  My friend said she loved me for that…she has a hard time with emotions and it is difficult for her to ask for help or support…my greatest gift to her has always been to express whatever is there…I have always supported her to be complete in every moment.

I talked with her for a long time and I told her that people would say a lot of different things to her over the next days and weeks…most of it kind but meaningless as the majority of folks can’t handle death and they will do whatever they can to avoid it…those are the people that say things like, “she is in a better place now”.  Those of us that have experienced death and not run away from it will tell her the truth…it is horrible, there is nothing more awful, you will have some very dark days and then the shock will fade some and the tears will come less frequently and you will get up and move through your days…you will laugh again and you will be less sad, however there will not be one day that you don’t miss the person you have lost and there will be some days where it seems again unbearable.

In the midst of it all if you are a fully functioning person there will be laughter mixed with your tears, there will be some anger at the loss, some “this isn’t fair” conversations in your head, some doubt of God’s plan…however those of us that have faith in something bigger than ourselves trust that life has a natural order to it and that things happen as they should even if we don’t agree.

Mostly people suffer greatly from a death when they are incomplete with the person that died…when they are still holding a grudge or the last words they had were in anger or they didn’t say that “I love you”…or they didn’t call enough or visit enough…or take time enough to tell people what a gift they are.  Those are the undelivered communications that bring you to your knees when someone leaves in an untimely and unexpected fashion.  Undelivered communications are what guilt and remorse are made of, I don’t recommend them.  I was taught at an early age to be complete in every moment…for some people close to me that means an “I love you” almost every time we speak…I think they tire of that, but I don’t care much because I know that if anything out of the ordinary happens I have delivered my message.

Walking my friend through her initial shock jerked me back to when my grandfather died…that is another reason people don’t deal well with the news of death because it causes them to momentarily relive whatever loss they have experienced and for some folks that is an unbearable thought.  People do strange things with death…which is funny because we are all going to leave this planet one day, one way or another…so it seems like there should be less fear and more acceptance.

People might leave this place, however the people that we love are never, ever gone…they are as alive as we make them.  My grandfather’s pictures are on my bedroom wall, in my hallway and on my desk…I think of him every day and often I can hear his voice in my head still advising me…and I am confident that he has sent certain people into my life to keep his watch…there are pieces of advice that he gave me that continue to shape my life…so for me he is still very much present.

Granted there are several people that I feel like I couldn’t live without, yet I don’t live in fear of them dying…life has a way of taking care of us if we let it…however we have to let it, which means a certain amount of trust in the process must be present…for many of us this isn’t the case.

You Always Have A Choice

Fear comes from thinking thoughts that scare you…you always have a choice…you can choose to think about things that keep you moving forward or you can choose to think about things that stop you.

I highly encourage you to choose to deliver your undelivered communications—unfinished business is bad mojo especially when people die unexpectedly…

Dressing For Work On A Budget

That necessary word…Budget. My husband and I own a small design and advertising firm and are on a tight budget in all aspects of our life. We budget EVERYTHING. Birthdays, Holidays, Groceries, School supplies, utilities, and the list goes on. We live paycheck to paycheck and very rarely do anything on a whim and especially not before consulting “The Budget”. Partially because we have to and partially because we have both experienced financial troubles in the past.  We use credit cards in emergency situations only and pay for everything in cash. If we come under the budget we rollover that extra in to a savings account. I scour the online sites, and paper ads for coupons and sales. Because I tend to go overboard on things occasionally, finding ways to save is almost an obsession to me.

I dress business casual most days and occasionally more dressy depending the situation. I own pieces in my closet that are years old. Finding and being able to afford to dress for work can be stressful but doesn’t need to be. You see a lot of articles online about dressing on a budget and after beginning to read the article you realize their budget is way more than what I would consider affordable. The struggle is real.  Where I am certainly far from a fashion guru a few of these things have helped me CONSIDERABLY when dressing on a budget.

*Buy pieces a little at a time and that are interchangeable. As you begin to build your wardrobe there are still 5 days a week every week that you need to dress for and introducing a piece at a time seems like it wouldn’t be helpful.  Black slacks, tan slacks, solid color shirts that can be changed up by adding a different scarf or a different piece of costume jewelry. One or two pairs of slacks and solid colored shirts can be worn repeatedly throughout the week just by adding those accent pieces. A little trick I learned from someone near and dear to me is to also try and style your hair a different way when wearing a repeat piece.  Believe me, I do it!

*Stay away from clothing that needs dry cleaned! Added expense that is not necessary.  Although, do pay attention to how your items need to be laundered. Washing and drying your clothes according to their care tags will keep the life of your items.

*Yes-I shop at Maurices, Old Navy, T,J Maxx, Wal-Mart, Target, Shoe Carnival.  Wal-Mart is awesome for buying scarves and jewelry. And almost always they have that stuff marked way down. It is true, purchasing more expensive pieces of clothing will last you longer. Again, sometimes that just isn’t reality. Purchasing that expensive piece falls in to my category of buying one at a time, over time.

*Some of my favorite online shops are Groupon and Amazon. I am not necessarily a fan of shopping for apparel online but most companies now offer free return shipping if the item doesn’t fit. And if it’s a deal I just cannot pass up I am willing to take the chance that it may not fit. I am very thorough about reading reviews, where the items are coming from, checking the return policy, and sizing charts.

*Most businesses now have their own rewards programs-take advantage of those! They do reap in benefits.

*Purchase items that are timeless. Slacks, pencil skirts, blazers.

* Be sure to buy things that are you! Buying an item just because it is on sale and not necessarily because you like it will result in a top hanging in the closet with the tags still on.

*I have a few friends who are close in size. We will have swap parties where we bring the items we are burned out on and switch around with each other.

*I LOVE Shoe Carnival-am always watching for their sale BOGO 1/2 off. We are constantly buying shoes for sports, recitals, weather changes, etc…I never not buy that 2nd pair!

What are your ways to save when shopping on a budget for work?

Love to All-Kim

 

 

 

 

The Greatest Loves Of My Life

I have 3 children who are the greatest loves of my life.  Honestly, I didn’t know I was capable of making something so perfect x 3. I am amazed and thankful each and every day that I have been blessed to spend with them-to call them mine-to raise and guide them and be their Mother. I have never felt a love so huge. I am far from perfect and have made so many mistakes.I try to the best of my ability and knowledge. There has been a lot of talk recently about getting “participation trophies” and being too lenient on the kids for just showing up. I can get behind that, I really can. I am not easy on my kids but there are things that I do that I most certainly am judged for.  I’m sure I am guilty of “participation trophies” on occasion for my children.  Yet for those who judge-there is so much more you don’t know. “Just showing up” sometimes is enough.

My oldest daughter is 19. She is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen both inside and out but she is fierce.  She tolerates little and has large opinions-much like her mother.  Through the years as I have matured I have also gained a filter-pick my battles-so to speak.  We are working on this with her 😉  She is in her 2nd year of college in the medical field, lives in her own apartment, works full time and maintains a 4.0 GPA. I am proud of her. Her life has not been easy. She is my only child from my first marriage-my first marriage was ugly-so ugly. She was little, I left her dad when she was 2 years old. She has seen and knows way more than I give her credit for when it comes to the strained relationship with my ex-husband. She has struggled through her youth trying to figure out where she fits in with her families.  Both her dad and I have remarried and have children with our current spouses. For my daughter it has been a constant struggle deciding which family is truly hers. We have had times of attempted suicide, cutting, and poor boyfriend choices. Her confidence in herself and her abilities were never enough in her mind. We have done lots of therapy and faith based counseling. She was never a trouble maker with the school or the law but she had trouble building relationships and trust with peers. At different times in her life I have carried the guilt of what if’s. What if I stayed with her dad, what if I said the wrong thing, what if I didn’t express my love for her enough….what if? In response to those what if’s I over compensated with what I felt she was lacking in. That was my responsibility and I own that. I noticed a few years ago I was beginning to raise an entitled snot. I panicked-how is she going to make her way in this world thinking everything is owed to her? So we dug our heels in and changed our approach and it was NOT easy for her or for me. Lots of tears. So yes, maybe I do high 5 her a little too often when she accomplishes something that seems so minor to those looking from the outside in.

My middle child is 15. He is the most big hearted, generous person I know. His love for all things living and outdoors is beyond anything I can comprehend. My son is the spitting image of his father. Laid back and never makes a mountain out of a mole hill. Until last year….he was a freshman…he became involved with the wrong crowd and has made some terrible choices. He was in trouble with the law and at the school. He was suspended from school and was charged with possession of marijuana. Is this anyone’s fault but his own? Yes-it is-NOT his peers or the “wrong crowd”-it was OURS as parents. Hindsight is always 20/20 and there were many red flags that we noticed after the fact that we should’ve been on top of to begin with. We were too busy comparing him to our oldest daughter to recognize that he is his own person with different needs. He has a slight learning disability and has never quite fit in with the 8 other boys in his class..yes, only 9 boys total in his class. He was hanging out with kids that were way too old for him to be hanging out with, leading up to his suspension and charges, the weekend before we discovered he had been sneaking out his window late at night and I chalked it up to normal teenage kid stuff. Thing is-not normal for him. When I say this child is the most delicate, loving, caring child-I mean it. So breaking our rules, lying, being deceitful, hurtful..was not in his nor had it ever been in his description of character and who he is. I cried and lost many nights of sleep and still do. I was raised by an alcoholic drug addict and I sincerely fear for my son. This is not the life I want for him. This is an ongoing situation with him, currently. We are about a year out from his charges and have had little to no issues since then. He is on probation. However, it’s still there, the fear I have of him becoming a drug addict. He has the signs, they are there. One might read this and think it was “just” marijuana and that may be true, but he is my son and I recognize an addictive personality when I see one. He is back in football this year, his grades are good and he’s trying real hard to straighten out his mistakes. He has reached out to teachers and said he wants to start over on the right foot. So when you hear me cheer for him a little too loud and a little too long for catching the 2-point conversion pass-just know that it may be ridiculous to you that I am so excited but to him, I and his dad-if he is going to be an addict its going to be for something that is good-addicted to the rewards of doing a good job! That long and loud cheer is cheering for all the steps he has made in the right direction.

My last, but certainly not least, child is 7. She is crazy! She is a perfect combination of my older 2. She is in the first grade and is busy learning to read, write, and all those other things that goes along with 1st grade.  It’s been a long time since I have had a 1st grader and it’s crazy to see how fast they change! I wonder what life has in store for her? Fortunate for us but probably unfortunate for her our older 2 have broken us in to being more aware of what trials and tribulations the kids face these days. I am 42 years old and things have changed tremendously since I was in school.

So yes-maybe I cheer too loud or pat on the back too often and boast about my child too much. Some days I can acknowledge and appreciate that “just showing up” took everything they had that day. I am trying my hardest to raise independent, kind, respectful children. It Takes A Village To Raise A Child is accurate in many ways but on those days where I am overwhelmingly boastful please don’t judge me or my child. There are reasons. They are perfect to me and needed to be reminded of that today. They are the greatest loves of my life.

-Love to you all, Kim

Self-Care On The Daily To Do List

 

Self-care is one of the most important things on my daily “to-do” list.  I rush around every day preparing breakfast, packing lunches, ensuring there are after school snacks in the house, checking homework, running kids to practices, making supper, shooing them into the shower, chasing them to brush their teeth and making sure they both have something clean AND wrinkle free to wear the next day. Be sure to insert 9+ hours of work and 2+ hours of housework into that timeline.  THIS is my daily routine with the exception of ONE thing.  Although that small thing may only last 5-10 minutes each day-it keeps me grounded and stress and anxiety at a minimum.  The days I have slacked (and there are very few) on self care aka “Me Time” is more than noticeable to those around me, in my performance, my attitude and with my children.

Depending on the season, my mood, my finances…my daily self-care ritual is always changing.  It doesn’t have to be expensive to get some quality “Me Time” but if given the opportunity to spend some money on yourself, please don’t hesitate. I used to fight with myself on spending a few dollars on getting my nails done, or on that mascara I have wanted for months, those leggings that are my favorite color and would go great with the top that I already have.  I then decided there was no point in the guilt of occasionally purchasing something for myself when my children have all their needs met and some of their wants, the bills are paid, some money in savings etc. Those $15 leggings end up being worth their weight in gold due to the way they make me feel!

In the real world most of us don’t have the opportunity very often to spend that extra $15 so I have found ways to self care on a budget that work just as well and maybe better.

*Reading 10 minutes of the book you’ve been wanting to start.

*Favorite cream in my cup of coffee.

*Writing myself a “love” note and sticking it on my mirror.

*Making sure I too have fresh and wrinkle free clothes in the morning.

*Waking up earlier than the rest of the house and drinking my COFFEE in quiet.

*Picking Lilacs from our bush and giving some to the neighbor or a friend.

*Listening to really loud music in the car on your way to work.

*Painting my fingernails/toenails a funky color.

*Homemade facial mask.  See some of my favorites here.

*Applying my make-up in a new way.

*Go for a walk

*Youtube Zumba workout

Honestly, they all seem like simple things and they really are but when it comes to your mental and physical health-that is something you just can’t put a price on.

I would love to hear some of your ideas on self-care, I am always looking for ways to improve mine.  You can comment here or email me kim@fortunatopartners.com

***PSA from Noelle

In order to populate the blog daily with new content my Staff will be joining me in writing blog posts each week, Kim (VP of Special Projects) and Kirsten (Director of Operations) will be sharing their insights and words of wisdom with you as well.  These are people dear to my heart and I trust that what they share with you will be useful and insightful.  We will label the blog posts from now on with the author so that you are clear on WHO wrote WHAT.  Thanks.  – Noelle

Posted by Kim (VP of Special Projects)

 

Chivalry Is NOT Dead…

Chivalry is alive and well and living in Boston.  I am quite sure that it is living in some other places too:)

We have had so many FB conversations about the perils of dating and about the pathetic men out there attempting to date you guys, so I wanted to give voice to the fact that exceptional men, do in fact, still exist.  Several of them happen to be very good friends of mine as a matter of fact.

A few weeks ago I went out to dinner with someone very dear to me and although I have known and loved him since I was 23, we had never actually been out on a date alone together.  So off we went to dinner and I was amazed at his impeccable manners.  He held doors, guided me into the restaurant, handled the reservations, pulled out my chair, helped me with my coat, stood when I returned from the bathroom, paid the bill, saw me safely to my car etc.

I was raised OLD SCHOOL by Old School Italians and these things I mention were just the way that things were done, then I grew up and started dating and I learned that these Old School manners were often long forgotten.  I had gotten so used to men just not acting like real men, that I was really, really appreciative of this gentleman’s manners.

Driving back to my hotel I thought about all of the stories that I have been receiving from you ladies about how men behave themselves on dates these days as compared to what I had just witnessed!  Like night and day–truly.

So I am here to happily report to you that Chivalry is not dead, it is alive and well and it is worth waiting for.  Going on this date reminded me of what it is supposed to be like, how adults should conduct themselves.  It also reminded me of how wonderful it is to be in the company of someone that has excellent manners and social skills.  This was already one of my most favorite people on the planet and now he is even more so.  His behavior gives me hope for humanity as a whole—if he is out there, then there are others and chivalry LIVES!!!

Do me a favor—STOP settling, stop pretending that it is OK to date sub-par humans…start realizing what YOU are WORTH and start expecting to be treated well…and when someone doesn’t measure up—WALK away.  Period.

If you stop putting up with poor manners and behavior then people will be forced to change in order to be in your company and you are so worth that!